The Unwanted Toddlers
by TheRottenJas
Summary: Hermione and Ginny are in Potions class when Goyle knocks over his cauldron causing a domino effect on Hermione's and Draco's potion. A loud explosion follows and a five year old Draco and Blaise appear! For some bizarre reason the boys take a liking to Hermione and Ginny causing the two girls to take care of the boys until Snape can find the antidote. A DeAged Fic More Info Inside
1. Chapter 1

**A/N: Okay so this is a De-Aged Draco and Blaise Fanfic! My main ship is Dramione! Of course we'll see more Dramione interaction because I absolutely love that pair but this a Blinny Fanfic as well. So we'll see that too! Okay this chapter is rather short and I can honestly say that this will probably never happen again. I tend to write a lot more and better too but for now I just needed a way to introduce this and cancel out any Ron emotions that Hermione might have(Don't worry NO Ron-bashing!). Hermione is repeating her Seventh Year so that's why Ginny and her are in the same class. For the purpose of this Fanfiction I've kept most characters alive! So yes, the following people are ALIVE! Lavender, Snape, Dumbledore, The Creevy Brothers, Crabbe, and anyone else who I mention along the story who is supposed to be dead. Oh, and Professor Snape isn't seen as a "bad guy" anymore but you know he still acts like that because it's a defense mechanism.(Well, at least in my story!)**

**So Please Review and Follow because I'd love to know what you think so far! **

**Written For The De-Aged Challenge! (I really just needed an excuse to write something like this!) De-Aged Draco. I also added Blaise!**

**Disclaimer: I own nothing mean, I am on Fanfiction for a reason, right? **

Hermione sighed as she turned her cauldron in Potions Class. Hogwarts had let all the Seventh Year students who unfortunately couldn't partake in their education due to the War come back to finish their education. Which meant the Seventh Year Class was the only class to have double the amount of students because every year moved up. Hermione was elated to be back to finish her N.E.W.T.S , however Harry and Ron weren't as thrilled. They had said yes reluctantly only to please her.

But now they were two months into the year and she was frustrated. She had expected at the least her relationship with Ron to change but nothing happened. It was as if their kiss never happened. Here she was back in Hogwarts with a boy who unfortunately chose to ignore what happened between them and ignored Hermione's signals that she wanted to talk. With those thoughts Hermione sighed again.

"What's wrong with you, Hermione?" asked Ginny who was her partner in Potions.

"Hmm, nothing," Hermione responded as she continued to turn the cauldron with her wand.

"I don't think it's nothing," Ginny said looking at her friend curiously,"You've been like this for an entire month now."

Hermione hesitated to talk to Ginny because she didn't know if she was being melodramatic, "It's your brother."

"My brother's an idiot, Hermione," said Ginny laughing, "I need more information, you know."

"It's just that," Hermione began, "Well, I told you we kissed during the battle, but he's acting as if that never happened!"

"Boy's are slow, Hermione," said Ginny smiling, "'And I can guarantee you that Ron's no exception."

"But that's not the problem," said Hermione sighing,"At least not all of it."

At this Ginny looked confused, "Then what is?"

"I'm not sure if I'm in love with him," said Hermione biting her lip.

"In love?" asked Ginny, "You like him, right?"

"I'm not sure. It's that if he were to ask me out I don't know if I'll say yes," Hermione replied quickly.

"Haven't you been in love with him for the last four or five years?" Ginny said in surprise.

"I-I think I've fallen out of love," said Hermione worried, "It's not that Ron is a bad guy but I think that I moved on."

Ginny looked at her shocked her a moment then she began to laugh loudly that heads turned in their direction.

"It's not funny," said Hermione trying to calm her friend down, "Ginny stop laughing!"

"But it's so funny," said Ginny holding her stomach, "I mean,really!"

"Miss Granger, is something the matter with Miss Weasley?" asked Professor Snape.

"No," said Hermione widening her eyes as he approached.

"Then can you quiet her down she's disturbing the class," He said cooly, "Ten points from Gryffindor."

Hermione pleaded at Ginny with her eyes to shut up,but the red-haired kept on laughing.

"Miss Granger I'm afraid I asked you to quiet her," Professor Snape said then as he opened his mouth to speak again a shriek was heard.

"EEE!"

The class swiveled their heads to see Tracey shriek as Goyle dropped their cauldron which in turn knocked over Hermione's own cauldron and then to spill Draco and Blaise's cauldron. There was a silence as the potions fused. BOOM!

"What's happening?" "I can't see a bloody thing!" "What's that smell?" "Where are you?" "EEE!" "See what you've done!"

"Silence!" said Snape as he made the smoke disappear, "Everyone calm down!"

Hermione rubbed her eyes and sighed. Her own potion was spilled all over the floor and on Draco's table.

"Professor?" asked a worried Daphne.

Snape looked at her before answering, "What?"

"Where are Draco and Blaise?" she spoke slowly.

"Draco and Blaise?" he repeated before looking at two vacant seats, "Class order! Have any of you seen Mister Malfoy or Mister Zabini?"

Hermione sat back down in defeat preparing herself to stand up and look until she felt a little tug at her robes. She opened her eyes and locked eyes with grey ones. She felt herself shriek as she realized who's those eyes belonged to.

"Hermione?" asked Ginny as she went over her seat, "Oh,Godric!"

"I believe I've found Malfoy," Hermione said nervously to the entire class as she lifted up a five year old child with platinum blond hair, pale skin, and grey eyes who squirmed in protest.


	2. Chapter 2

**A/N: Wow. Thank you all so much for following this story! I really wasn't that confident in the first chapter so Thank You! Here is Chapter 2 which I hope you'll all enjoy! Oh, yeah I will be switching P.O.V later on but not yet so far it is Hermione's. Please Follow/Favorite and Review! I'd love to know what you lovely readers think!**

**So I'll answer some reviews here!**

**aeireis: Yes, I don't really understand why many authors bash on Ron! He's great I just like Draco a bit more! Lol.**

**Guest: Yep! No violence, that is if you call little boys throwing tantrums violence that yes by all means this story is super violent! Ha.**

**Disclaimer: Nope, not at all. The plot however is mine.**

**Chapter 2 **

"Let me go! Let me go!" shouted the five-year old who was currently flailing in Hermione's arm, "Just wait until Daddy hears about this! No one touches me without my per-per-permishin!"

Hermione turned to look out Professor Snape who looked baffled but found his voice, "Okay, Draco is there... Now where is Mister Zabini?"

"Um, right here, Professor," said Ginny indicating at a dark little boy who was cowering behind her leg.

"Thank you, Miss Weasley," he said then addressed the class, "Now, I imagine this is what happens when you brew an Aging Potion the incorrect way, and a Memory Potion. For the meantime. class is dismissed. Be careful of the spilled potions."

The class shuffled slowly looking at the tiny Draco who now had been lowered, and the tiny Blaise who looked at them with fear. Hermione stared at the child who was frowning at her. He looked completely different than the teenage Draco. This miniature version was staring at her now with a curious expression on his face looking innocent in the process. She was taken aback, but quickly let him go and gathered her stuff.

She was all set to go when a tiny little arm pulled on her robes. She looked at Draco who was in a shirt that was far way too big on him with a frown back on his face.

"Where are you going?" he asked her in a bossy tone.

"Um," she was at loss for words, "Ah, do you know who you are?"

"Of course," he said puffing his tiny little chest, "I'm Draco Malfoy!"

"Okay, good," she said looking slightly less worried, "Well, Malfoy you're going to stay with Professor Snape, and I'm going to leave, okay?"

"No!" he said crossing his arms, "Why are you leaving?"

"Because" she said trailing off before thinking of something, "I'm not exactly fit to take care of you. I'm pretty sure your mother is going to come for you."

"My mom?" he said.

"Yes, your mother," she said, "Now be a good little boy, and stay right here on this table. Okay? Just wait for Professor Snape to come back from his study."

"Hermione," called Ginny who was now carrying Blaise, "Don't they look adorable? I mean, look at him!"

"Ginny," said Hermione adding a little bit of strain,"We have to go."

"Oh, all right," said Ginny setting Blaise next to Draco then she grabbed her stuff.

"Ginny?" called the little dark boy who sounded like he was about to cry,"Are you leaving me?"

Ginny looked at Hermione with an expression of utter helplessness and gestured to the boy with exaggerated hand movements. Hermione looked back at her and they shared the same look. What was a girl to do when a little child was going to cry? Obviously, their maternal instincts came and they crowded the child reassuring him that they weren't going anywhere. Hermione patted the little Blaise and tried to smile really big until she felt as tiny fist thump on her back. Draco was looking at her with a mad expression.

"Hey! You, you hor-horrible woman!" he shouted at her, "Why are you touching him?"

Hermione couldn't help but laugh at Draco he looked so funny pointing his little finger at her. He looked positively mad but his face was adorable.

"Are you laughing at me?" he said scrunching up his face at her.

"Oh, no, no" she said smiling, "But what's wrong?"

"Why are you leaving me? But not him!" he said pouting at her.

"Oh, because," she said as she leaned in whispering, "Malfoy's a big boy, right?"

"Yes, I am!" he said proudly.

She hid a smirk, "Well, Blaise is not a big boy yet so he needs to have someone with him, but not you."

"Why can't I have someone?' he said confused.

"Because Malfoy is big boy and he doesn't need anyone, but Blaise does so that's why were with him," she explained.

"I-I want to have someone pat my head," he said softly looking at the red-haired women pat and hug the other boy.

Hermione felt overcome with emotion and immediately hugged the little boy.

"You want to kill me!" gasped the little Malfoy struggling.

Hermione let go of him smiling a little she patted his little head, "There you go."

He smiled so brightly at her Hermione thought she was going to faint. Gone were the smirks they became smiles, and the scowls became frowns. It kind of unnerved her to have her academic rival smile so innocently and grand at her. She instantly remembered who he was. Sure, they weren't at each others throat's anymore and they formed a some sort of weird truce thing, but didn't exactly mean he usually talked to her.

"Ah," she said standing up eyes-wide,"Yes, I have to go!"

"Really?" Draco said his smile falling.

Hermione's heartstrings pulling and she grabbed her bag, "Really!"

"Really?" said Ginny looking at her with a puppy dog face as she hugged Blaise.

"Miss Weasley, Miss Granger," said Professor Snape walking back into the room, "I've alerted Professor Dumbledore."

"Ah, it is true," said Professor Dumbledore walking in with a familiar twinkle in his eye.

"Oh, good," said Hermione with relief, "Now if you'll excuse me."

"Just a moment Miss Granger," said Professor Dumbledore smiling his calm smile, "It seems like little Mister Malfoy doesn't want to let you go."

"That hardly seems of importance," remarked Snape.

"But I believe it is," Dumbledore said, "So Severus how long do you think you can find an antidote?"

"Well," said Professor Snape glancing at the spilled potions with uncertainty, "I'll have to see how each potion was brewed and then I would be able to formulate a potion depending on the situation."

"So awhile, Severus," he responded.

Snape grudgingly answered, "A While."

"I propose that Miss Granger and Miss Weasley take care of the boys meanwhile," said Professor Dumbledore smiling the twinkle now brighter.

"By all means, Professor," began Hermione, "It is N.E.W.T.S Year, and it's our last year adding in the classes we take."

"Not to worry Miss Granger," said the Headmaster reassuring her, "I believe you are at the top of your year and the N. .S aren't until the end of the year. Are you sure you can't take care of Mister Malfoy?"

Hermione hesitated she had never really refused any assignment, it wasn't in her nature to give up. She decided to take a leap, "I'll do it."

"Miss Weasley?" he asked.

Ginny didn't hesitate at all,"Gladly, Professor."

"Well, that settles it," the Headmaster smiling now he addressed the children, "How would you guys like to stay with Miss Granger, and Miss Weasley?"

"Who's that?" asked Draco frowning, "I want to stay with the horrible woman."

"The girl with red hair," said Blaise staring at Ginny scared.

"Great!" said Dumbledore," Do you know that the girl with red hair is Miss Ginny Weasley, and Draco that's not very nice but the "horrible" woman is Miss Granger?"

"Hmph!" said Draco huffing, "I'll take her!"

"Yay!" said Blaise pleased.

"You may report to the the fifth floor corridor and you'll find a room that for purposes sake has been used and fixed to inhabit Miss Weasley, Miss Granger, and the boys. The portrait is one of a woman taking of children the password is for you to decide," Professor Dumbledore said then he left.

"I suggest you leave now," said Professor Snape glancing at them and at the potions.

Hermione nodded and told Malfoy to get off, "Let's go Malfoy, I guess."

Ginny picked up Blaise with her hands and was heading toward the door already talking animatedly with Blaise. Hermione walked or at least turned to walk until she heard a cough behind her.

"What's wrong, Malfoy?" she asked a little frustrated.

"Why aren't you carrying me?" he spoke bossy again.

"Because," she smirked, "Nobody's allowed to touch you without your permission, remember?"

"Well, you might be a hor-horrible woman," said Draco then he opened his arms, "But I give you permishin so hurry up!"

Hermione saw him opening his arms looking away blushing and all she could think was, How did I get in this situation? She picked him up and walked towards the door disbelief on her face. She then heard him whisper in her ear.

"I like you for a horrible woman that is."


	3. Chapter 3

**A/N: So here is Chapter 3! I'm really amazed at the number of people who follow/favorite this story! It makes me really happy and I do write more. No matter how odd that may seem. I'm also sorry for typos and mistakes! I don't have this beta'd and I just finished typing this because I wanted all you lovely readers to enjoy it! In this chapter we get to see Ginny's perspective near the end! Don't worry we'll see more of her in the next chapter. Please Review it's always nice even if it's just to say 'Hey, you don't suck! Oh, and should I show Draco's and Blaise's perspective? Anyway, thanks for anybody reading this! You all deserve like massive hugs and chocolate! Unless, you don't like chocolate.**

**To the Guest reviewer's: Thank You! I have no idea who you are but I love all your reviews! Oh and it's totally fine that the boy's know how to speak and actually say some big words. According to very promising websites kids know how to speak at the age of 3,4, or 5. Also, Draco,and Blaise do come from pureblood families so they should know how to speak.**

**Disclaimer: Nope, and now I'm sad.**

Hermione froze in her tracks. What did he just say? She looked at the toddler in her hands who stared back at her with big bambi eyes. She gave him a nervous smile as she began walking again. She tried to catch Ginny's attention with her eyes with no avail. It was strange. Malfoy, albeit a miniature Malfoy, saying he liked her? That was too bizarre for Hermione even with a de-aged Draco in her arms.

"Ginny?" she asked hesitantly.

"Yes, Hermione?" said Ginny as she stopped entertaining Blaise.

"Um, well, Malfoy said he liked me," she said bewilderment on her face.

Ginny laughed, "Kids say they like everyone! Who treats them nice that is, so don't worry about it! Blaise said he liked me, too."

Hermione gave a sigh of relief. Good.

"Hermione?" said the little Malfoy leaning back to stare at her.

"Yes," she said trying to get over the fact that kid Malfoy was so much more open than teenage Malfoy. He had just called her by her first name! That, too, was strange.

"Why am I here?" he said tilting his head.

Hermione froze yet once again, how do you explain to a child that he reversed in age.

"Miss Hermione?" he asked snapping her back from her trance.

"Oh, um, later," she said hastily,"I'll tell you later."

"Okay," he said accepting her answer.

She shook her head Professor Dumbledore was always a great wizard who had solid and wonderful plans and ideas, but this? No, not one at all. How could someone trust Hermione, an only child, to take of other children? She liked children, but she never ever babysitted any children in her course, whenever her aunt and uncle came she cooed over the child but they never left her in her care.

She glanced at Ginny who was talking with Blaise laughing. Oh, Ginny always said that whenever her family came she had to take of the children. No wonder, Ginny was so good at this. On the other hand, she wasn't faring so bad with Draco. Ginny smiled and beckoned her over to the portrait.

"Hello," the plump lady said as she carried a baby," Why don't you have the adorable kids ever? I'm assuming Dumbledore sent you over here?"

"Yes," said Hermione,"We have to choose the password,correct?"

"Right, you are my dearie!" she said laughing, "Now, once you've figured it out just tell it to me!"

Hermione looked at Ginny nodding as she put Draco on the ground. Ginny did the exact same motion,

"Alright," said Ginny in a loud voice,"So Blaise and Draco have to give us a password."

"Password?" said Blaise confused.

"Yup!" continued Ginny,"Well, to enter this room. We have to choose a password which is like a secret word that no one can know but the four of us!"

"Secret!" said Draco excited, "Okay! I like secrets!"

"Now, what word do you want to choose?" said Ginny smiling.

"Hmm, snake!" said Draco jumping up and down,"I own a snake! They are cool!"

Hermione stifled a laugh as Draco talked about how snakes were cool. Really? So Malfoy liked snakes even from back then. She saw him pout as he saw Ginny and Hermione almost laughing.

"Are you laughing at me?" he said putting his little hands on his hips.

"No of course not!" said Hermione hastily but Ginny had cracked and was starting to laugh like crazy.

"Liar!" pointed out Blaise as he saw Ginny go red,"She's almost the same color as he hair!"

Hermione couldn't help herself and burst out laughing.

"Hermione!" cried little Draco stamping his feet,"Why are you laughing?"

"Oh, I'm so sorry, Malfoy," she said wiping away a few tears, "Okay, how about lions? Do you like lions?"

"No!" screamed Draco, "Daddy says lions are nasty creatures, and I should only like snakes!"

"Hermione!" said Ginny in between breaths,"You going to kill me!"

Upon hearing this Blaise opened his eyes wide and stood in front of Ginny with his arms wide open, "You can't kill Miss Ginny! I won't let you!"

She stared at tiny Blasie with disbelief and amusement apparently little kids took everything literally, "Oh, no! Ginny meant that she was going to die of laughter!"

"Laughter?" said Blaise putting his arms down,"You can die of laughter?"

Hermione couldn't help but tease the boy,"Oh, yes! If you laugh too much your stomach can't handle it so POP! You die!"

He opened his eyes even wider and looked worried at Ginny who was now rolling on the floor.

"Liar!" shouted Draco annoyed that they ignored him, "Nobody can die from laughing!"

"Yes, they can!" said Ginny from the floor, "My cousin died from laughter 5 years ago!"

Draco seemed unsure now but still stood his ground, "No, they can't! I've laughed really hard yesterday that milk came out of my nose! And I didn't go POP!"

Hermione smiled at him,"Just Kidding! You are smart, Malfoy!"

Draco puffed out his little chin and looked as smug as a five-year old can look, "I know. My tutors always tell me."

"Okay, so does everyone agree that snakes is our password?" she asked Ginny, who had only recently got off the floor, Blaise, who still looked worried at Ginny, and Draco, whose head was recently inflated.

"I want lions," said Blaise softly, "I like lions."

"But snakes!" whined Draco.

"How about Snakes and Lions?" asked Ginny combining both choices. The boys looked thoughtfully before agreeing.

"Snakes and Lions," Hermione told the portrait, "That's the password."

"How amusing," said the witch,"I'm Widow Shelley, and this is your new dorm."

Hermione looked a the boys as they walked through. She shrugged at Ginny and the portrait closed behind them.

Ginny sighed as she rubbed her stomach. Hermione really had tortured her because Draco's answers were already leading him to Slytherin. She stared at Blaise who was looking around in awe. She giggled because Blaise was nothing like she had imagined him to be. The Slytherin boy had never really talked to her before and now that he was he was a toddler. She sat down in the couch of the remembered the very first time she talked to Blaise.

_-Flashback-_

Ginny walked down to the Quidditch Pitch sighing. She was angry with Ron, and thus the entire world.

It wasn't fair that Ron would tease her about her crush on Harry. That ended in the summer after 4th year, and Ginny just didn't like Harry that way. She supposed her entire infatuation with him in the first place was because he was 'The Chosen One.' She blushed remembering herself in Second Year,and how totally crazy she must have seemed to him. She was happy now that she could talk to him, and she wouldn't be fawning all over him. He took her apology and they just became friends nothing more.

But her insufferable idiot of a brother seemed to think she still had a massive crush on him. Even though, she had recently broken up with Dean he seemed to think that it Harry she was pining after. Needless, to say she kicked Ronald's arse in the duel whipping out her Bat Bogey Hex before storming out. Here she was now in the Quidditch Pitch just sitting on the grass not even wanting to fly.

She didn't know how long she sat in that position crying her eyes out. But as she was sobbing a voice interrupted her cry.

"Oh, woe is me, To see what I have seen, see what I see!" cried a very theatrical voice.

She instantly turned surprised to be staring at Blaise Zabini. He plopped down right next to her, and smiled. She was taken aback, of course, this was 6th year.

"Don't cry, Weaslette," he said in a surprisingly soothing voice, "You need your strength for what's going to happen, don't you?"

She merely nodded her head.

"You're in Gryffindor," he stated, "Gryffindor's don't show weakness they show bravery and courage to overcome whatever has come their way."

She whispered, "I am in Gryffindor."

"I'm sure you won't let a problem stand in your way, right?" he said casually.

It was as if someone had lit a fuse under her, "Yeah! I'm a Gryffindor! No idiot like Ron is going to get to me!"

He modded his head as she suddenly got up. She already started walking away when she turned back and yelled, "What were you saying in the beginning?"

He gave her a wink and simply said, "Hamlet."

She gave him a confused look before running to the Gryffindor Tower to see Ron.

_-Flashback-_

"Ginny!" cried an impatient Blaise.

Ginny looked startled almost falling sideways off the couch. She turned to the boy, "Yes?"

"You stopped moving!" he said loudly.

"Did I?" she asked.

"Yes!"

"Don't worry I'm still here," she said ruffling the boys head, "Thank you, my little knight."

"Knight?" echoed the boy confused.

"You tried to save me from dying," Ginny explained, "So you're a knight now."

"Oh, cool!" said Blaise running off to tell Draco.

Ginny shook her head fully knowing the thank you meant a lot more.


	4. Chapter 4

**A/N: Okay, first off, I just want to say how very, very sorry I am! Something happened in RL and it was pretty devastating. On top of that, the chapters I had completed for this story were all gone when my flashdrive broke. Then my laptop had to break because of my ignorant cousin, and I had saved the chapters there as well. =.=**

**So sorry! Okay, um, I'll ramble more at the end. Please READ THE AUTHORS NOTE AT THE END! IMPORTANT! :)**

**Disclaimer: Nope, I don't own it.**

* * *

"Wake Up!"

Hermione groaned as she felt a heavy weight on her stomach. She mumbled 'no.'

"Wake Up now!"

"Leave me alone," she murmured, trying to push the heaviness off her.

"I said WAKE UP!"

Hermione opened her eyes to find Draco pouting at her. He somehow climbed her bed to wake her up. It would have been adorable, if Hermione wasn't half-asleep. "What time is it?"

Draco smiled cheerfully. "I dunno. I just woke up."

She got up slowly, making sure she didn't drop Draco. She glanced at the clock. "Malfoy! It's 6:00 am!"

He titled his head curiously. "So?"

Hermione stared into his too innocent eyes. She sighed in defeat. "Nothing."

"I'm hungry," he whined. He climbed off her bed. "Feed me!"

"Is that why you woke me up?" She asked in disbelief. She cracked a smile when he smiled sheepishly. "Let's go see what we can eat."

Hermione looked around her room and grinned. It was better than the average dorm in the Gryffindor tower. The room Ginny and Hermione shared was fairly large. Speaking of Ginny, she was still asleep. Hermione walked over to Ginny's bed to see a bundle of blankets.

"Ginny, wake up," Hermione softly spoke. She shook the bundle gently."Wake up."

"Don't wanna," was the muffled response she received.

Hermione sighed before throwing the covers off the Gryffindor girl. Ginny yelped in response to the cold wave of air that struck her.

"Hermione! I was sleeping!" Ginny said, her eyes wide with shock. She looked disheveled with her hair looking quite messy.

"Well, now you're not," she replied, rolling her eyes. "Go wake Blaise, please."

"What are you going to do?" Ginny asked, shivering slightly from the cold.

"Make breakfast," Hermione answered. "It is going to be healthy since they are children."

Ginny made a face. "I think I'm going to go eat in the Great Hall instead."

Hermione frowned. "Just because it'll be healthy doesn't mean it's not going to be delicious, you know."

"Alright," Ginny relented. "Anyway, I don't think the boys can go out just yet."

Hermione nodded. She left Ginny to get sorted and took Draco, who was busy looking at her books, into the restroom. She brushed her teeth, and did the same to Draco. It was quite the difficult task.

"You have to brush your teeth!"

"Don't wanna," he whined. "It feels weird."

Hermione frowned. Her entire childhood she had known the dangers of not brushing her teeth and how to maintain your teeth in perfect condition.

"Stop! You stop!" He said as he saw her fill the toothbrush with toothpaste.

"Look, Malfoy, do you know what happens to children who don't brush their teeth?" She was speaking in a serious voice. Draco shook his head no. "Well, you see, when they get older they have all these cavities. Cavities are little holes in your teeth, and then your teeth start to rot. They become all yellow and nasty and no one would want to come near you."

He looked shocked. "No! No!"

"You're going to brush your teeth?" She asked, holding his toothbrush towards him.

He nodded rapidly. "Yes!"

Hermione smiled and ruffled his hair. Taking care of Malfoy wasn't so terrible. Sure, he was a giant spoiled brat but the innocence in him was startling. He was just like any other kid his age. "I'm going to the kitchen, okay?"

"Why?" Draco asked. "Send the elf."

"I'm sorry, what?"

"Mommy always says that the elf's do the cooking!" Draco responded.

Hermione sighed. So this is where the similarities end. "In my home, my mom or I do the cooking."

Draco wrinkled his nose. "You do it? Why?"

"Because many of wizards and witches don't have house elfs to do the cooking and cleaning for us," Hermione patiently told him. "We have to do the everything, and it's good."

Draco furrowed his eyebrows in thought. "But . . . Daddy says that every pureblood has elf."

Hermione frowned. Did he think she was a pureblood? "Look, not everyone is a pureblood. Some of us are half-bloods or muggle-borns. And the majority of us don't use house elfs."

He looked mind-boggled to find that out. "Daddy says every res-respec-respecatable family has them."

Hermione's heart faltered to hear that. "What else does your 'daddy' say?"

"That half-bloods and mud-bloods and muggles are scum," he slowly said, making sure he repeated it correctly. Hermione flinched at his casual use of mud-blood. "What are muggle-borns?"

"Muggle-borns are mud-bloods."

"Oh," he said.

"Draco, can you do me a favor?" She asked him. He nodded his head. "Don't ever say mud-blood again."

He looked confused. "Why?"

Hermione cleared her throat before she spoke. Explaining this to a child, nonetheless, Draco Malfoy was going to be difficult. "When I was twelve, I had two best friends and one of them was on the Quidditch team."

"I like Quidditch!" Draco added. "I have my own toy broom."

Hermione smiled. "I'm sure you do." She took a deep breath before she continued. "So, one day when we were at the Quidditch Pitch, the Slytherin Team came down, too. There was this mean boy, he had been bugging my friends and I, that was with them."

"He was in the team?" Draco asked curiously.

Hermione nodded. "He said something mean, so I said something rude in return. But he called me a mud-blood after that."

Draco's eyes widened like saucers. "You're a mud-blood?"

Hermione winced at the word. "I'm muggle-born, yes. But after he called me that my friends got really angry. It means I have dirty blood, that I'm filthy. It made me cry for a really long time."

Draco's face fell. "You cried?"

Hermione nodded, faintly recalling all the memory. This new information seemed to get Draco angry.

"We should go beat him up!" He exclaimed loudly.

"Who?" Hermione asked as she returned to the present.

"The mean bloke!"

Hermione smiled but shook her head. "That's very sweet of you, but no." She hesitated in speaking the next part since she wasn't sure if Draco was going to remember all of this when the potion lost effect. "I've already forgiven him.

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**A/N: Again, so sorry, it's short. But I lost motivation after the incident. . . I started to join challenges and I've written more Dramione's! They're on my profile if you want to check them out.**

**Okay! I have a vague idea where I want to take this story. At least, I have the ending figured out. The middle part is where I'm stuck at. So, I'm asking you, the readers, to review any ideas you want to see happen! Thanks so much for all your wonderful support! I'll update more tomorrow!**

**Please review! :)**


	5. Chapter 5

**A/N: I know! I know! I'm late in posting! I'm such a liar! Please don't come after me with pitchforks! But on the plus side, this one is longer than the rest! I kind of outlined vaguely, really vaguely, how the Story will finish. It should be around like 12-15 chapters. And I'm on Chapter 5. *sighs***

**Thanks you all for your wonderful support! I'm a horrible author! You've been great! We're like 3 reviews away from 60! Oh my Merlin! That's a lot!**

**Oh, and special thanks to Fluffmelody and SmileSimplify! Definitely gave me some ideas! So, again, if you'd like to see (er, read) certain scenarios Id be happy to oblige! **

**Disclaimer: I own nothing... *crys in the corner***

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Ginny and Hermione carefully made their way out of their living quarters with two Slytherin's in tow. After Hermione had made a nutritious breakfast, that was not as bad as Ginny thought it would be a letter had come for them. She recognized the elegant script of Professor McGonagall asking to meet them in Professor Dumbledore's office. It was to discuss the matter of the de-aged Draco and Blaise. Ginny looked over at the Slytherin boy who was grabbing her hand for safety measures. He wore an expression of fierce concentration as he tried to keep up with her long strides. She laughed and slowed down for Blaise's benefit.

"No fair," Blaise grumbled, looking adorable as he pouted. "You are tall!"

Ginny ruffled his hair with her other hand. "I'm older, that's why. Just wait till you get older then you will be taller than me."

"Really?" he asked, his eyes shining bright with excitement and hope. He was beaming at his mind went over this new possibility.

Ginny had to smile at his expression. It was true that the Slytherin boy was taller than she was but he didn't really smile often. Sure, she had seen him smirk plenty of times, but truly smile? She had only caught glimpses of a smile from time to time. However, miniature Blaise and Draco smiled all the time. They were very expressive children. It sometimes made her wonder how they came to be so inexpressive. "Yes, really."

He nodded, smiling cheerfully as they made their way to the statue. Ginny could see Hermione scolding Draco for something as he stood by and rolled his eyes. She stifled a laugh at her best friend. Trying to teach Malfoy manners, probably.

"Oi Hermione!" she called from behind them. Hermione turned her head curiously, stopping in mid-sentence. "Do you think they will go to class with us?"

Hermione shook her head quickly, shortly forgetting about whatever Draco had done. "No. At least I don't think so."

Ginny nodded in agreement. "Yeah, can't you just imagine Pansy and the entire girls cooing over them?" She put on her shrillest voice, raising it a whole note higher. "Oh my Merlin! You are so adorable! How is Dwaco? You're a cute baby, aren't you?"

Hermione laughed as Draco pouted. "I'm not a baby!"

"Jeez, Ginny, I think you imitated Pansy spot on," Hermione commented. She then reassured Draco that nobody thought of him as a baby.

Ginny shrugged. "Just think about it for a moment. How would they react when these two walked through the doors? I mean the girls, and I do mean all the girls, would go crazy. Kids are cute."

"The female species do tend to go crazy over kids and babies," Hermione reflected.

"But I'm not a baby!" Draco said, stamping his foot on the floor for emphasis. "I'm a big boy!"

Ginny bit her lip to keep from bursting aloud. "We know that, Malfoy."

Draco seemed pleased by her answer but his brows furrowed in confusion. "Pansy?"

Ginny eyes widened. "You know Pansy?"

Draco and Blaise nodded. "She comes to play with us."

"Really?" Hermione asked, incredulously. "Like a playmate?"

"Yeah, but she always makes Draco play the prince," Blaise added sulkily. "I'm never the prince!"

"But I don't want to!" Draco said, looking at Hermione in horror. "She wants me to kiss her! That's gross! Girls are gross!"

"You do know that I'm a girl? " Hermione asked, pointing at herself.

"You don't act like one," Draco pointed out stubbornly.

Hermione laughed then ruffled his hair. "We're here now, so it's okay."

Ginny smiled at their playful conversation. She spoke the password on Hermione's nod. "Blood Pops."

As if it had come to life, the statue moved revealing a spiral staircase. The boys greatly admired the magic once more. Ginny remembered the first time she had seen the spiraling staircase in her second year. It, too, had left her speechless.

"We better go up now," she mused, looking at the boys. They grinned foolishly at each other.

Hermione smiled. "It never gets old, does it?"

"Nope," she responded, popping the 'p'.

"You can't be serious Professor!"

Professor Dumbledore smiled calmly. "I'm afraid no one can take care of them on this short notice. I'm positive they won't be much of a distraction."

Hermione's eyes widened significantly. "They're children! Of course, they'll be a distraction!"

Professor McGonagall nodded in agreement. "You can't be serious Headmaster. I'm sure I'll receive complaints about their disruptive behavior."

"Nonsense Minerva," Professor Dumbledore responded. "They are children. What harm can they possible do?"

"Well, children can be quite the handful," Ginny began, "because they are so energetic. I've had to take care of smaller cousins and they are really rambunctious."

Hermione nodded rapidly. "They don't have much of an attention span yet so won't they get bored easily? Kids need to move and be active. They won't like it in a class where they have to sit all day."

"You have nothing to worry about. If Miss Weasley already has experience, it should be rather easy."

"I've never really taken care of children myself," Hermione added. "I'm an only child and growing up I didn't play with kids my age."

Professor McGonagall sighed. "All your teachers have been informed of the matter. If any trouble arises, they have been notified of what they have to do."

Hermione shared a worried look with Ginny. How can Professor Dumbledore and Professor McGonagall expect Hermione to take care of a toddler? She looked over where the boys were busy playing with Professor Dumbledore's knick-knacks. She sighed. "Really, Professor. What about their parents?"

Dumbledore's blue eyes twinkled brighter. "It really is horrible timing. Unfortunately, Mrs. Zabini is out of country and Mrs. Malfoy is busy."

Hermione nodded reluctantly. He had her cornered and he knew it. She couldn't possibly refuse and leave the toddlers without anybody to look after them. "I understand Professor."

"Hold on a second," Ginny interrupted, looking bewildered. "Hermione and I have different classes in the morning. How are we going to take care of Malfoy and Blaise?"

"Well, Miss Weasley, one of you takes one child and one takes the other," explained Professor McGonagall. "Then that way you wouldn't be taking care of two but one. This should be much easier, really."

"Before we leave Professor, how much longer will the potion take effect?" Hermione asked.

"I'm afraid I don't know that yet. But as soon as we do, we'll be sure to inform you."

Hermione sighed as they made their way out of Professor Dumbledore's office. There was still some time left before class started. "Gin, who do you want?"

Ginny looked between the boys in thought. "I don't really know."

Hermione frowned, this was going to be more difficult than she had anticipated. "Okay, what is your first lesson?"

"Charms," Ginny answered, still scrutinizing the boys.

"I have Ancient Runes," Hermione added. "Maybe I should take Malfoy and you take Blaise?"

Ginny nodded, moving her gaze away from the kids. "Why? Not that I mind, of course."

"I'm unsure of when they're going to revert back to their regular selves but Malfoy has Ancient Runes with me," Hermione clarified. "I'm sure he won't remember any of the information right now, but at least he won't be marked down for attendance."

Ginny rolled her eyes. "Attendance, really? He's a toddler for crying out loud."

"It matters," Hermione mumbled under her breath. She could feel some heat rise to her cheeks.

"Well, meet me in the Great Hall for lunch?" Ginny prompted uncertain.

Hermione agreed. "Say goodbye to Blaise, Draco."

Draco waved at Blaise before leaving with Hermione. "Where are we going?"

"Class."

"Is it fun?" Draco asked curiously.

Hermione nodded. "Yes, I love solving and translating runes."

"Hermione!" called out Theodore Nott.

"Hey Theo," she greeted. "Going to class already?"

He smirked. "I could say the same about you."

She laughed. "Well, if you didn't notice, I've got Malfoy with me."

Draco looked at the two interact silently. Who was that boy with Hermione?

"Hey, Draco," Theo said, smiling wide.

"I don't know you. Don't talk to me," Draco responded rudely. Stranger Danger, after all.

"Draco!" Hermione scolded him. "That's not how you greet people."

"Don't you recognize me?" Theo asked, pointing at himself.

"No," Draco said slowly. "Should I?"

"I'm Theodore Nott."

Draco's eyes bugged out of his head. "Theo?"

"Yeah, that's me," Theo answered, amused at his reaction.

"Why are you so big?" Draco asked, almost yelling.

"I grew," was Theo's short response.

"Wow." Draco was marveled.

Hermione smiled at his childish reaction. "You know when you grow up, you're taller."

"I am?" he asked incredulously.

She nodded. "Yep."

The trio continued on their course to class.

"Miss Granger, Mister Nott, and little Mister Malfoy," Professor Babbling said from the class' doorway. "I have been expecting Mister Malfoy."

Draco looked at Professor Babbling blankly.

Hermione looked thrilled. "Oh?"

"Minerva's sent me some activities he can do while I teach," she said, pointing to a little desk at the corner of the room. Coloring books, color pencils, and crayons were all neatly stacked on the desk. Some children books were there as well.

"Do you like to color, Draco?" Hermione asked.

Draco nodded.

"Perfect! I'll take you to your working station then," Professor Babbling said, taking a hold of Draco's hand.

Hermione waved goodbye and proceeded to take her seat at the front of the class. Theo followed her taking the seat next to her.

"Remember if you need anything; raise your hand, okay?" After instructing Malfoy, the professor left him.

Draco liked coloring. What he didn't like was coloring for over an hour! He was bored and lonely. He could barely see Hermione in the front with Theo. Draco pouted as he thought of Theo. Theo was taking away Hermione from him. As soon as he showed up, she stopped talking to him. Now she even sat away from him.

"Stupid Theo," he mumbled as he broke the crayon he was using.

He didn't know how Theo got big all of a sudden. He remembered Theo as smaller than him. Pansy always made him play a princess, too. He sighed dramatically but no one turned around. He sighed again but this time letting his arms drop loudly on the table. No one turned.

He frowned. Why is nobody looking at me? He was used to everybody paying attention to him. He crumpled a sheet of paper and began throwing them to the students.

"What?" A boy turned around to stare at thee small child. Draco instantly began coloring again, looking innocent. They boy stared a little longer before turning back to his work.

Draco grinned. "Fun!"

He began crumpling other sheets of paper. He threw it at the same boy again.

"What? Again?" The older boy turned to look at Draco. Draco smiled innocently. He even waved a little.

As soon as the boy turned around, Draco threw him five more. He loved watching the boy get confused and angry.

"Stop!" he screamed at Draco. "I saw you! I knew it was you!"

Draco made his bottom lip quiver.

"What are you doing Ernie? Making a child cry!" The girl beside him shook her head. "He's just a kid. It's not like he's doing this on purpose."

"No! That's what he wants you to think! He's not crying for real, Padma!" Ernie said, whispering furiously.

"Ernie," Padma said in an exasperated tone.

"Yes, he is! Just watch Padma!" Ernie said, scowling at Draco.

Draco was aware of the older girl named Padma watching him. He carefully made a paper airplane and threw it in the air. It fell a little short before it reached anybody.

"See?" Padma said, smacking Ernie. "He's just making paper airplanes. It's not his fault he doesn't have good aim. I swear you get so dramatic sometimes."

Padma turned away but Ernie continued to watch Draco. Draco laughed and stuck out his tongue.

"He stuck his tongue out at me! I saw him!" Ernie cried loudly that he disrupted the other conversations.

"Is there something you wish to share Mister MacMillan?" Professor Babbling asked from her desk.

"No," Ernie mumbled, scowling at Draco's direction. Draco smirked as Ernie got punished.

"Then I advise you to be more quiet next time," she said, giving him a very pointed look.

Ernie sat down angrily. He pointed two fingers to his eyes then at Draco, mouthing the words 'I'm watching you'. Draco grinned. This was the most fun he had here yet. He got another paper and wrote in the inside 'ERNIE STINKS!'

Draco made sure his aim was correct before throwing it. I wish the message was bigger. Like an explosive!

"Ahh!" Ernie leaped from his desk. The paper exploded directly in front of him. Everybody in the class swiveled to see what the big commotion was. Then in red color two words were scribbled in the air.

'ERNIE STINKS!'

"I told you so!" Ernie screamed in victory. He stared smugly at Padma who looked flustered.

"What's going on?" Professor Babbling asked as the words slowly faded.

"AWESOME! " Draco laughed loudly making the students stare at him. "Did you see that?"

"Draco!" Hermione yelled. She gave him a look of disbelief. "Did you do that?"

Draco grinned proudly. "Yes! It was great!"

Hermione looked dismayed. "Accidental magic?"

Professor Babbling nodded. "Take him to Professor Dumbledore, dear."

Hermione nodded, grabbing her belongings she went over to Draco. "We're leaving, okay?"

Draco nodded enthusiastically. "Yay! Let's go!"

Hermione grabbed Draco's hand and walked out of the classroom. She sighed as soon as they were alone.

"What's wrong? Are you sad?" Draco asked, noticing Hermione had been sighing a lot. _Why was she sad?_

"I'm not sad. That was dangerous, you know," she said, frowning slightly. "Ernie or Padma could have gotten hurt."

"I'm sorry," Draco whispered, putting his head down. He didn't know his harmless fun would be trouble. "I didn't know."

Hermione ruffled his hair, smiling. "It's okay. I'm not angry at you."

"You're not?" he asked hopefully, lifting his head up.

Hermione laughed. "Nope. It was pretty funny."

"Right?" Draco said, smiling wide. "I don't even know how I did it! It was like I felt a thing shoot out of me!"

Hermione snickered causing Draco to frown. "Sorry, reminded me of electricity."

"Electo-what?" Draco asked, scrunching up his nose in distaste. "It sounds weird. I don't like it."

"Never mind," she said, shaking her head slightly. Of course he wouldn't know what electricity was. "Anyway, what made your write Ernie stinks?"

"'Because it was funny?" Draco replied, tilting his head to the side.

Hermione faintly smiled remembering the pins Malfoy made in their Fourth Year. He had charmed every single one of them to say 'POTTER STINKS!' then deflate in a funny drawing of Harry. Thinking back on it, it was pretty impressive magic that Malfoy did all by himself.

"Hermione!" called Ron as he rounded a corner. "Where are you going with Malfoy?"

"Ron," Hermione said, surprised. What was he doing out of class? "Oh, he did accidental magic in class. I have to take him to see Professor Dumbledore."

"Oh," Ron nodded, understandingly. "I just met with Dumbledore right now, actually."

"You did?" Hermione looked at Ron curiously. Why would Professor Dumbledore meet with Ron? "What for?"

"Oh, just discussing my career choices," he said, shrugging his shoulders.

"I didn't know they did that," Hermione said.

"Hermione!" Draco screamed loudly. "We were going somewhere!"

Hermione sheepishly smiled at Ron. "Sorry, looks like Draco's getting frustrated."

"It's cool, 'Mione," Ron replied. "Oh, but I'm not the only one who's been called out. Bye!"

Hermione furrowed her eyebrows as Ron walked away. She was more than positive they didn't use to discuss career options. She wondered what brought it out all of a sudden.

"Blood Pops!"

Hermione looked over in surprise as Draco yelled the password cheerfully. "Not so loud, Draco."

"Sorry, I love his room!" Draco said, running up the stairs. Hermione ran after him.

"Stop running!" She yelled. "It's very danger-what happened to you?!"

Ginny smiled sarcastically back at her. She was red. Hermione couldn't believe her eyes. Ginny was literally red. Her skin was a bright red. Only her clothes and her eyes were different colors. "What do you think happened?"

"Accidental magic?" Hermione looked at Ginny in horror as she inspected her more closely. Blaise had turned her exact color of her hair.

"Why aren't you colorful?" Ginny demanded, crossing her arms.

"How? How did this happen?" Hermione asked, looking at Blaise a little more worrisome. Blaise on the other hand was happily chatting with Draco.

"Long story," Ginny said, shaking her head.

"Miss Weasley?" Professor McGonagall asked in shock. Ginny nodded sulkily as their Professor made their way towards them. "I think we have a lot to talk with Dumbledore."

Hermione sent Ginny a reassuring look before entering Professor Dumbledore's office.

"Accidental magic!" Professor McGonagall said. "Look what happened to Miss Weasley! And I'm informed, her entire class!"

Professor Dumbledore stared calmly at Ginny then back at Professor McGonagall. "Ah, so age five is when they show signs of magic."

"Please take this a little more seriously, Professor," Ginny said, ignoring Hermione's look of disbelief. "I'm red!"

"Miss Weasley, that'll wear off shortly, and Minerva there are children. There is nothing we can do about it right now. The potion still hasn't worn off."

"When will it wear off?" Hermione asked, curiously.

"Severus will show up shortly. He will give us further insight," Professor Dumbledore insisted. "He should be here any minute now."

As if one cue, Professor Snape walked in. Hermione sighed in relief. Hopefully, Snape had a solution.

"I've figured out how the potion will wear off," he drawled, looking at the two boys.

"That's fantastic!" Hermione cried.

"Not really," Snape said, glaring at Hermione for interrupting. "The potion is going to wear off as they get older."

"How so?" Professor McGonagall asked. "They are five currently."

"Well, they will grow rapidly. Today they are five and tomorrow they could be eight," he explained. "I don't suspect this will take long. Maybe a week or two weeks."

"Two weeks?" Ginny said, looking worriedly at the boys.

"I'm afraid so, Weasley," Snape said.

"Two weeks," repeated Professor McGonagall. "That's not so bad, is it?"

"That's it girls," Dumbledore said. "There's your answer."

Hermione's head rapidly counted the time. In two weeks, many things could happen. But by the end, they would be eighteen years old. Wait, how was that going to work out. "Professor, I have a question."

"You don't say Granger," Professor Snape said, his voice dripping with sarcasm. He rolled his eyes. "What is it?"

"Actually, Professor Dumbledore, will we still be taking care of them?" Hermione asked. "Since they'll be around fifteen or sixteen in a week or so, we won't have to be their babysitters anymore."

"Yes," Professor Dumbledore agreed. "But they are still young, so will you still take care of them now?"

Hermione and Ginny shared a look before they nodded.

"Excellent!"

"Hermione!"

They all whipped their heads to see Draco crying as he shook slightly.

"What's wrong?" she asked, running over to him.

"Blaise!" he managed to gasp out in between sobs.

They looked at the dark-skinned boy curiously.

"Does he look bigger?" Hermione asked. She was sure he was smaller before.

"Yes!" Ginny said, shaking the boy. He was unconscious. "You think he grew?"

Hermione comforted Draco, stroking his back gently. She talked in a soothing manner. "Its okay, Dragon. It's okay."

"H-He started to shake a lot," Draco said, calming down a bit. "Then he fell. Now he won't wake up!"

Hermione looked up at Professor McGonagall worried. "It's going to be okay."

Ginny sighed in relief as Blaise groggily woke up. "Are you alright?"

Blaise nodded. "Yes, but why are you crying?"

Ginny laughed hysterically. "He's fine! Thank goodness!"

Professor Dumbledore smiled. "See, it's perfectly fine. I believe it's lunch now. Can you take them to eat?"

Hermione nodded, grabbing Draco's hand. She bid her Professor's goodbye and walked out with Ginny and Blaise.

"I'm happy you're okay," Draco said, playfully hitting Blaise in the back.

"Stop! I'm older than you. It's not cool for me to play with you," Blaise said, pushing Draco away. He wouldn't receive Ginny's hand either.

"What?" Draco said angrily.

"Yeah," Blaise said, lifting his head higher. "You are a baby still. See, you even touch a girl!"

Draco pouted and pulled his hand away from Hermione. He frowned as Blaise walked in front of him.

"Are you okay, Draco?" Hermione asked him.

"Shut up!" he said, annoyed. "I'm angry that I cried for him!"

Hermione's lips twitched. "You are?"

"Yes!" He said, stamping his foot down. "I'll show him!"

"How?" she asked, playing along to Draco's tantrum.

"I won't tell you, horrible woman," he said, sticking his tongue out at her.

She raised a brow. "Horrible woman?"

"You lied," he pointed out. "It's not fine! Blaise doesn't want to play with me anymore."

"I didn't know," Hermione said honestly. How was she supposed to know that Blaise would be like that? "What are you going to do?"

"You'll see, horrible woman. You'll see."

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**A/N: Yes, I brought back Horrible woman! I can do that because I'm the author. *smiles cheekily* Hopefully, and I'm saying Hopefully, I'll update this Saturday! And if the writing muses decide to inspire me again (and your friendly ideas!) the chapter should be longer than this!**

**Don't forget to Review! I know I don't answer most of them, but they mean a lot! I'm also trying to work on that! Again, friendly ideas are helpful!**


	6. Chapter 6

** A/N: Hello! I know. I'm late, and all. Don't worry, I will be updating weekly because I figured a system that works for me! I hope you enjoy it! Actually, I was just writing and this came out….**

**IMPORTANT! PLEASE READ!**

** Okay, I****'****ve started a new Dramione multi-chapter but that would be four stories I currently have going. I worked out a system where I could update every Saturday! However, the problem is I can only manage three stories. Therefore, I have created a poll where you can vote which story I have to, unfortunately, put on Hiatus. Just for now! I will continue the story for gets the most votes but after I finish any off the stories, I**** will**** be working on. PLEASE GO AND VOTE! It****'****s on my profile!**

** Word count: 2366**

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Hermione looked curiously at Draco Malfoy. She knew him to be a lot different from how he was acting right now. So was this the beginning of the Slytherin in him? He was tiny so what damage could do this little boy actually do? "Nothing dangerous, right?"

Draco smirked. It looked all wrong on the little boy. She remembered older Draco smirking and how attractive he looked. She blushed faintly at her thoughts. Looking at child Draco, it was just adorable. "Even better."

She nodded cautiously. They entered the Great Hall and easily half the eyes were on them. The other half were on Blaise Zabini. Hermione saw the seven year old making wild gestures and laughing at the center of the Gryffindor table. She could see Ginny looked exasperated. Before she could call out to her friend, Draco ran to where Blaise was. Hermione cursed slightly and ran after him. "Stop! Draco!"

"Blaise!" yelled Draco Malfoy marching to where the dark-skinned boy stood.

Blaise stopped mid-sentence and looked for Draco. He sighed, looking irritated. "What do you want now?"

Draco frowned. "Why are you angry?"

"You stopped me from finishing my story!" Blaise answered as if it were the most obvious thing in the world. "Where was I? Oh! So I'm on my broom in the air and a squirrel flew out of her tree almost knocking me over!"

The girls nodded enthusiastically while the boys chuckled at the story.

"It's a good thing I have balance," Blaise added, grinning proudly.

Hermione cracked a smile at how proud he looked. Draco glared at Hermione for liking Blaise's story.

"You know my friend, Harry, is the captain and seeker of the Quidditch team," Ron said, elbowing Harry in his stomach. "He's the best. We've won so many times because of him."

Blaise's eyes widened. "Really?"

Harry sheepishly nodded. "Um, yeah."

Seamus grinned at Ron. He swung an arm around Harry's shoulder. "He was on the team as a first year! A first year!"

Blaise looked around the table confused. "So?"

"You can only be on the team in Second Year!"

Blaise's mouth opened in shock. "Wow! That's amazing!"

Dean laughed. "He won the House Cup for us when we hadn't won in years!"

"He caught the snitch with his mouth in First Year!" Neville said, grinning widely. "He took a nasty fall!"

"Did you really do all that?" Blaise asked, leaning towards Harry.

"Yes," Harry mumbled, shooting glares at his supposed friends.

"Wow!" Blaise said. "I don't think I'll forget you!"

The entire Gryffindor table laughed at Harry's embarrassed expression.

"Ron is actually the keeper on our team," Harry said, pointing at a confused Ron. "In sixth year, everyone called him our King!"

Ron's ears tip became bright red. "Harry! I thought we would never talk about that again!"

Ginny grinned, playfully punching Ron. "Weasley is our King!"

Even Draco regarded Ron with some respect. He couldn't stop himself from asking questions. "Did you always block out the quaffles?"

"Not always," he mumbled, looking at anywhere but the blonde boy.

"Well, you can't stop all of them," Blaise interrupted, sticking up for Ron. He glared at Draco. "I'm sure he was chosen because he was the best!"

Draco stomped his foot. "Maybe he wasn't."

"He was!" Blaise declared, patting Ron's shoulder in support.

Hermione nearly choked on her pumpkin juice. Of course, she remembered sixth year. She had such a ginormous crush on Ron back then. She had even confounded Cormac for Ron! She was glad she was over that phase. Ron looked helplessly at Harry who smiled and said nothing.

"I bet I could do better than him!" Draco argued.

Hermione stifled a laugh. Not even knowing Ron, Draco was already saying he was better than he was.

"Right, Hermione?" Draco said, nodding at where Hermione sat.

Hermione turned at him flabbergasted. "Um, well, yes."

Ron gave Hermione a look, and she shrugged.

"So, _Ron_, you accept?" Draco asked, sticking his little hand out for a handshake.

Ron smiled nervously. What was he supposed to do in a situation like this?

"Of course Ron accepts!" Seamus grinned at Ron. Ron shot him a dark look before shaking hands with Draco.

"Great!" Draco smiled cheerfully.

"I don't think that's going to be possible," a feminine voice said.

They looked up to see Pansy Parkinson with her hands on her hips. Behind her were Theodore Nott and Daphne Greengrass.

"Why not?" challenged Seamus.

"He's a child," Pansy answered, rolling her eyes. "Anyway, you are forgetting who he grew up with."

Blank stares answered her question.

"I grew up with him," she said exasperated. She gave them looks of disbelief. "How do you think we knew each other?"

"Didn't you guys become friends on the train?" Lavender asked puzzled. "I know that's how most of us became friends."

"No. We were forced to play with each other as children because we were respected families." Pansy answered in a matter-of-fact tone.

"Oh."

"Anyway," she began," don't you think we're more suited to take care of Blaise and Draco then Granger and Weasley?"

Hermione and Ginny exchanged looks. Pansy had a point. An excellent point. Why were they selected in the first place? Pansy obviously knew more about the boys than they did. Theo was very good friends of Draco and Blaise, and she could only assume the rest for the other Slytherins. So, why indeed was it Hermione and Ginny's responsibilities? It made absolutely no sense. Pansy knew their behavior and how they were going to behave, as they grew older. It seemed only fair that she would be the one taking care of them.

"Um, er, I don't know?" Ginny replied, her face full of confusion.

"See?" Daphne supplied. "I think the Slytherin House should take the boys."

Instantly, the entire Great Hall was whispering amongst one another. The Ravenclaws were listing the pros and cons. The Hufflepuffs sided immediately with Hermione and Ginny. The Gryffindors were unsure and the Slytherins were wondering who possible made the decision of taking the Draco and Blaise.

"Could the Slytherin's take the kids?"

"Is that allowed?"

"Maybe…"

"I don't even trust Pansy, much less with a child!"

At this comment, Pansy objected. She glared at the general direction of where the comment came. "Oi! I'm very much capable of taking care of children."

They gave her dubious looks.

"Wait!" Neville's voice was barely heard through the murmurs of the Great Hall.

"Yes, Longbottom?" Daphne asked.

"Didn't Dumbledore make this decision?" he asked, glancing at Hermione and Ginny who stayed eerily silent.

Hermione slowly nodded, trying to see what point Neville was making.

"Then I think we should stick with what he thought was best," Neville explained. "He probably knew Pansy, Theo, and Daphne would know what to do. However, there must be a reason why he chose you two. I don't know what that is but I think Malfoy and Zabini should stay with Hermione and Ginny."

There was a stunned silence where nobody moved.

Slowly Seamus began to clap then soon the Gryffindors were cheering and howling.

"You go, Neville!"

"WOO! Way to go!"

"Wait!" Pansy said, stopping the rambunctious crowd. "Can we do a test trial?"

"What's that?" asked Ron. Only it came more out more like "Waz zat?" since his mouth was full of food.

Pansy looked disgusted at his manners before explaining. "For instance, let us take them for the rest of the day then before curfew we'll give them back. Just to see who can deal with them better."

Hermione mulled this suggestion over. It was a good idea. Perhaps she could actually get work done in class. At least peace for a second. She pursed her lips before nodding.

"Are you serious?" Ginny asked her. She looked over at Blaise and Draco who were very much confused.

"I think it's a good idea," she clarified. "It's only to see if it works. I mean, I do want the best for them."

Ginny sighed then nodded at Pansy. "Take them."

Pansy grinned and smiled at the boys who regarded her suspiciously. She glanced back at Hermione. "Class is starting soon. Don't you have Arthimancy? That's pretty far away."

Hermione laughed. "Thanks for the reminder. I _should _get going."

She stood up and grabbed her bag. She waved goodbye to the others before heading out. A small tug from her skirt made her turn around.

"Wait! I don't walk as fast as you do," he said, struggling to get down from his seat.

Hermione's heart softened. "Draco, you can't come with me."

He jumped down and his smile vanished. "What?"

"You're not going to go with me," she said, crouching down to his level. She ruffled his hair endearingly.

"Why not?" he demanded, pouting.

"We're testing something, so you can't come with. But you're going to go with Pansy and the others, okay?" She patted his head before rising.

Draco's lip quivered as he watched her leave. Why was she leaving him?

"Don't worry, Draco, you got us," Theo said, thumping himself on his chest.

Draco nodded, sniffling a bit. He rubbed his nose and began to follow Theo. He was not going to cry for that woman. No, he wasn't! She was a mean and horrible girl who hugged him a lot and took care of him and … and

"Don't cry!" Blaise appeared at his side suddenly. He grinned at Draco. "We're going to go with Theo! He is not a girl!"

Draco lifted his head. What was Blaise saying? "He's not a girl?"

Blaise laughed. "No! Girls are mean! They have germs!"

"They have germs?" he asked. He knew the word but what did it mean?

Blaise nodded rapidly. "They have a ton of them!"

"What do germs do?" Draco only knew his mother told him not to play in the mud because it had germs.

"They make you sick!" Blaise twisted his face into a funny expression. Draco laughed. "You feel awful for days!" Suddenly, Blaise fell to the floor. Draco stepped back in shock. Blaise opened his eyes and screamed. "Then you die!"

Draco had never been more scared. Germs were scary! Hermione always hugged him or touched his hair! "Am I going to die?"

"No, no," Blaise said, standing up. "Simple touches only make you sick!" He lowered his talking to a whisper, making sure Theo didn't hear them. "Make sure they don't kiss you."

Draco nodded. He shook his head; trying to brush off the germs Hermione left.

"Hurry up, you two," Theo said, only a foot in front of them.

Daphne laughed. "I'm right behind them."

Draco looked at Daphne suspiciously. He ran to Theo and clung on to his leg, making sure no girl touched him.

* * *

Hermione's afternoon was quieter than she expected. It was peaceful but she rather missed the trouble Draco caused. Every now and then, she would look beside her but he wasn't there. She sighed; perhaps she missed the child a little too much. It was interesting to see Draco as a child. Ever since the War ended, it had been difficult to get back into the routine again. There were so many important things out there to do that going back to school seemed like a joke. However, she didn't want the War to take experiences from her so she instantly agreed.

"Hermione!" called Ginny sneaking up behind her. "We get the munchkins back, right?"

Hermione raised up a delicate eyebrow at Ginny. "Munchkins?"

Ginny laughed. "It was something that came up during muggle studies."

Hermione nodded, unable to keep the smile of her face. "Wizard of Oz?"

Ginny scrunched up her nose in thought. "I think so."

"Anyway, I'm glad we get Draco and Blaise back," Hermione replied. She shook her head in disbelief. "I can't believe I just said that."

Ginny nudged Hermione with her elbow. "It was nice though. I kind of missed them."

Hermione sighed and nodded. "Yeah, I did, too."

"Oh, here they come!" Ginny said, pointing excitedly to where Pansy, Theo, and Daphne rounded the corner. The boys were running around a very tired looking Draco.

"Hey, Hermione, Ginny," greeted Daphne. "Here are the boys. Please take them."

Pansy rolled her eyes. "They weren't that bad, Daph."

Daphne scoffed. "You might be ready for kids, but I'm most definitely not."

Theo quickly grabbed Blaise and Draco by their collars to keep them from bumping into each other. He chuckled. "They are quite a handful."

Pansy flicked her hair. "At least they listen to you."

"Cuz I'm not a girl," Theo argued.

"Let us go!" Draco struggled under Theo's grasp.

"Well, here they are. Keep them."

"See ya."

"Good riddance."

Pansy sniffed then walked away.

"What happened?" asked Ginny, who wasn't able to say a single word. The conversation had been surprisingly short.

Hermione looked over at Draco who looked angry with her. "What's wrong, Draco?"

Draco frowned and stuck out his tongue. "You left me."

"I had to. Theo, Daphne, and Pansy are your friends."

"I don't even know the blonde hair, " Draco protested, crossing his arms.

Hermione titled her head in confusion. "But you did have fun, right?"

Draco looked down and nodded.

"Do you want to go with them again?" she asked, crouching to meet his eye level.

Draco looked up and shook his head.

"Why not?" she asked gently.

"They don't tell me stuff. They act as if I'm a baby."

Hermione giggled and reached to pat his hair but he pulled away.

"No. Don't touch me," he quickly said. He hid behind the older dark-skinned boy. Blaise wouldn't get near Ginny either.

Hermione frowned and stood up to her full height. What happens to children at the age of seven? She remembered reading and trying to avoid…boys! "Draco, do you not want me to touch you?"

Draco looked over at Blaise who nodded firmly. "Yes."

"How about they stay at the boy's dorm?" Ginny said, looking at Hermione eagerly. Hermione looked at the two children who wouldn't go near them at all. "We could stay at the Gryffindor dorm, too!"

"We can ask Harry, I suppose…but only for the night!"


	7. Chapter 7

**A/N: **Wow, can you believe it? An update? Whoa. I'm sorry guys it's been forever and that this is short. RL is fairly busy and well, I'm happy that we have a whole week off! A WHOLE WEEK! Thank God for thanksgiving! So, I'll be updating some time next week again. Also, THANK YOU! I'm glad so many people find this interesting and not sucky, and still read it. I'm happy! Also, wow, so many reviews and follows! Thank you so much!

**N**: Er, honestly this is not a very serious story. . . You'll see what I mean. . .

**Disclaimer:** Nope. Never Have, Never Will.

* * *

"Well, I guess this is it," Hermione began, handing over the packed duffle bags to Harry. She glanced at Draco and Blaise who had already changed into their pajamas. She smiled at Draco's dragon pattern then turned to to Ron. She had a stern expression. "Make sure they actually get some sleep. No staying up too late, alright? Oh, if you plan to have any snacks before and all they have to brush their teeth. If anything happens, come to us. We'll be staying in the Girl's Dormitory so you'll have to send a messenger or owl."

Ron rolled his eyes and nodded. "Don't worry Hermione. We can handle children."

Hermione bit her lip but consented. "Goodnight boys."

Ron grabbed them by their hands and they disappeared into the boy's dormitory. She sighed and headed towards her own dormitory. No doubt Lavender and Parvati would have invited other girls for their own sleepover.

* * *

Draco eagerly entered Ron and Harry's room and looked around in curiosity. As he soaked in the messy pile of clothes that he they shoved into a corner and the posters of Quidditch team plastered onto the wall, he felt oddly disappointed. It was so . . .plain. He looked at Blaise who went straight to Harry Potter; his face was slanted in open awe. Draco frowned, walking after Blaise who sat next to Harry. Draco looked around the boys who had gathered into a circle and looked closely at each one. Harry Potter, Ron Weasley, Neville Longbottom, Seamus Finnegan, and Dean Thomas each smiled encouragingly at him. Draco walked over and firmly sat next to the dark-skinned boy.

"Hello there mate," Dean Thomas greeted, looking curiously at Draco.

Draco nodded stiffly. "You seem normal."

Dean smiled, his eyes crinkling and his mouth pulled into a wide grin. He leaned forward, glancing at the other boys in amusement. "Want to know why?"

Draco nodded, leaning forward. "Why?"

"I grew up with kind muggles, that's why," Dean proudly said. "So muggles, not all of them, are bad."

Draco had been wondering about that for a while actually. He knew Hermione was a muggle-born and that meant she had muggle parents. Draco frowned, unsure of who he should believe. Daddy always told him that muggles were bad, right? So they should be bad according to daddy. But he liked Hermione! Not that he would tell her or Blaise because they were filled with germs! He huffed, throwing his arms up. "I give up!"

Dean looked at him in surprise. "Give up what?"

Draco shook his head. "Nothing."

Seamus grinned, showing his exploding snap cards. "Want to play?"

Draco looked at Blaise who nodded and he agreed. He still had to get Blaise back and maybe this was a way to do that.

* * *

"But he's so hot!" cried Parvati, looking at Hermione with a disgusted face. "He's Viktor Krum! _International Quidditch player_!"

Hermione shook her head. "No, we're not dating. I mean, I did like him back in Fourth Year but we never really dated." She remembered that they had kissed before and she turned crimson. "We still keep in touch however."

Parvati noticed that blush and pounced. "But you've snogged! Haven't you?"

Hermione wanted to sink into further into her pillow seat. She nodded, blushing like mad. "If you mean we kissed then yes."

Ginny whistled. "No wonder Ron was jealous in Sixth Year, right?"

Hermione rolled her eyes. "Don't remind me. I was so jealous that year that it makes me shudder thinking about it."

Lavender nodded, patting Hermione's shoulder in support. "My attitude was shocking! I like to think I've matured since then."

Ginny grinned. "I would like to think that, too."

Lavender pouted, crossing her arms. "Whatever."

Hermione cracked a smile. She was on a friendly basis with her roommates now after everything. Who wouldn't be? She was lucky that they were able to treat Lavender in time despite the serious injuries Greyback had caused her. She looked at the Gryffindor girl and smiled. There were no hard feeling between the two anymore.

"You know who also is really hot?" Lavender asked, waggling her eyebrows suggestively. "He's called the Sex God, you know."

Hermione rolled her eyes, taking a sip of her orange juice.

"_Draco Malfoy_!" cooed Parvati and Lavender together.

Hermione spit out her drink, almost choking on the substance. She looked apologetic at Ginny who pulled her wand out. She shot a wild look at Lavender. "_Malfoy?!_"

Lavender grinned, nodding. "Draco Malfoy, the Slytherin Sex God."

Hermione flushed, looking at Ginny who nodded. Why had she never heard that before? "I still can't believe that!"

Ginny laughed, "I heard it, too. Draco Malfoy, the Slytherin Sex God, and Blaise Zabini, the Italian Sex God! I think it's supposed to be some kind of joke, though."

Lavender shook her head. "I heard a girl who confirmed it!"

Hermione sighed, shaking her head. She still couldn't believe it.

* * *

Draco grinned, looking smugly at the defeat in Blaise's face. He ruled!

Blaise scoffed, crossing his arms. "It's just a game."

Draco laughed. "I beat you in everything!"

Blaise scowled while the rest of the Gryffindor boys cheered loudly for Draco's win. Draco laughed loudly, pointing his finger at Blaise. He laughed so hard, his little frame started to shake. He laughed and laughed then started to cry as his body shook violently. Harry shouted something then Dean picked him up and carried him to bed. He felt really tired all of a sudden the next thing he knew Hermione was standing over him looked scared. He smiled then passed out.

* * *

"You know, he's not that bad," Ron commented to Hermione.

Hermione took his eyes off the sleeping child. "What?"

Ron jerked his chin to Draco. "Not that bad, little Malfoy." He chuckled. "It's going to be a nightmare scrubbing these words off the walls."

Hermione laughed as she noticed all across the walls, posters, floors, and beds were the words Draco Rules, Blaise Stinks written in tiny green cursive. Hermione waved her wand and smiled proudly at Draco. That was a darn good charm.

* * *

**A/N:** Yes, I did that! Slytherin Sex God! xD Don't worry that was really just for my amusement! Please Review!


	8. Chapter 8

**A/N: **Well, here's the update! I didn't expect it to be so soon actually! I'll have another one this week too. So, I was looking at the number of people who follow this story and I was surprised! NEARLY 300! Just ONE more and there'll be 300. WOW. YOU GUYS ARE AMAZING! Also, 4 more reviews and I'll reach 100! Wow, I wasn't expecting this much love for it! THANK YOU! It astounds me. On an unrelated not, I've done it. I've gotten a tumblr. *sighs* I'll be stuck there in no time... Oh, it's my username, too. xD I HOPE YOU ENJOY IT!

**Word count: **1,606

**Disclaimer: **Nope. Never Have, Never Will.

* * *

"Stay away!"

Hermione sighed, running a hand through her wild hair. How on Earth was she going to get Draco to do what she said? It was as if her skin was poisonous to him. "I don't have cooties, Draco." She opened her arm wide and let him examine her. She could hear the small click of his tongue in disapproval. "See?"

Draco looked at her as if she were incompetent and stuck his tongue out. "Like I'm going to believe you."

Hermione really didn't have time for this right now. If they didn't leave now then she would end up late. And that was never an option! She grabbed a ponytail from the nearby dresser and quickly styled her hair into a quick bun. She needed to go and eat breakfast before she hurried off to Transfiguration with Professor McGonagall. She grabbed her bag and quickly slung it over her shoulders. She fixed her brown eyes pointedly on Draco's grey ones when she approached the door to exit. She crossed her arms, arching a brow, as if expecting him to refuse. "I'm going down to the Great Hall for breakfast. Are you going to come with me? No, wait, you have to come with me."

Draco nodded, grabbing his own smaller version of a messenger bag. He shot her a disgusted look as she reached for his hand. "Don't touch me."

Hermione sighed, stuffing her hand in her pockets. "Yes, yes, whatever you say." She sighed again as she realized she still had to open the door. She grumbled as she took her hand out to open the door. She noticed Ginny outside the hallway with Blaise. She nodded to Ginny who wore the same sullen expression as her own. Hermione grinned as Blaise walked next to Ginny but his side was completely against the opposite wall. "What are you doing Blaise? Isn't it a bit difficult to walk like that?"

Blaise shook his head. "I wouldn't want to catch it. It's better this way."

Hermione noticed Draco take a few steps away from her. She shot Ginny a look of exasperation before heading off. The boys ran in front of them and sometimes would shoot looks in their direction. Every once in a while they would stop and look at them to confirm the passageways they were taking.

"Can you believe it?" Ginny asked Hermione incredulously. "Cooties? Germs? Honestly, I didn't even think they would worry about things like that."

Hermione grinned, shaking her head. "Remember? They grew up with Pansy. I bet they liked to make germs an excuse to get away."

"Oi! Granger, I heard that," Pansy called as she turned a corridor. She frowned, looking at the boys. "It's probably true, however."

Hermione shot an apologetic look. "Sorry."

Pansy raised a perfectly arched black brow. "Why should you? It was funny."

Hermione's steps faltered and she looked at the Slytherin girl in surprise. "But it was rude!"

Pansy shrugged. "Just because it was rude that doesn't mean it wasn't funny."

Hermione nodded unsure. Was that how they joked around in Slytherin? If that were true, now wonder they're jokes seemed a little cruel.

"Hermione! Open the door," shouted Blaise, pointing at the the door handle to the Great Hall. They were a little too short to reach it quite yet. "Harry's waiting for us!"

Hermione stifled a laughter at the sentence that seemed so out of place but did as told. She swung the door open and she could hear the gasps and intakes of breaths. Then the talking started:

"He's so cute!"

"They're so tiny!"

"Oh, I want to hug him!"

"Woo! The Blonde Champion!"

"Great job last night!"

"Way to go!"

"ADORABLE!"

Hermione winced at people began talking and openly pointing at the children who went straight to the Gryffindor table. She could see Draco boasting about a win of some sort and she sighed. Blaise was continuing asking questions to Harry, who looked bashful. She made her way next to Ginny and sat down. She reached for the juice pitcher and almost made hand contact with Draco. He looked scared then relieved then disgusted. He pulled his hand back, wiping it with a napkin; Draco scooted farther away from her. Hermione could already tell this was going to be a long day.

* * *

"For the love of - Blaise!" cried Ginny, attempting to steer him in the right direction. She glared at Harry who Blaise had clung onto. She placed her hands on her hips. "Look, Blaise, we go that direction. Harry goes the other!"

Blaise shook his head. "I want to go with Harry."

Ginny in response shook her head. "No, I don't think so." Harry cleverly dislodged Blaise's hand off him while Ginny was talking. "What's so cool about Harry anyway?"

Blaise laughed. "He plays Quidditch!"

Ginny smirked. Was that really all to it? Just because Harry played Quidditch? Honestly, she played Seeker for Harry in Fifth Year and they still won! "Want to know something?"

Blaise looked at her suspiciously but apparently his curiosity got the better of him because he nodded slowly. Harry quietly left while he was distracted, making sure not to walk to hurriedly.

"I play Quidditch, too," Ginny replied proudly, grinning goofy. She was a darn good player at that, too.

Blaise scoffed. "So, I play Quidditch, too. Right in my backyard."

Ginny frowned, "No, I'm on the team with Harry. I play Chaser for Gryffindor."

Blaise gave her a blatant look over. "You are?"

Ginny found that highly offense. She raised her chin and nodded. "Yes I am. I play chaser and we are going to have a practice soon!" She didn't know why but she felt she had to appear cool in front of a child. "I reckon a match as well!"

Blaise beamed, jumping excitedly. His dark orbs brightened and he seemed to forget she was 'infected'. "Really?"

Ginny nodded. "Yes. So let's go, alright?"

Blaise beamed, still making sure to keep his distance, and bombarded her with question after question. Ginny sighed, why the Merlin did she want to appear cool?

* * *

Hermione, on the other hand, was having a blast with miniature Malfoy in Transfiguration. Professor McGonagall had left review work on transfiguring their eyebrows and hair before they got into more serious transfiguration such as actual humans.

"You're like me!" cried Draco, pointing excitedly to Hermione's platinum blonde hair. He reached out to touch it but pulled his hand back. Instead, he patted his own head to prove his point.

Hermione grinned, twirling the blonde lock in her hand. "Yes, I've got the Malfoy hair."

"I think I like your brown hair more," Draco declared, staring hard at her hair. He cautiously, very slowly, reached out grabbing a lock of curly, blonde hair. He frowned, then dropped it. "Change it back."

Hermione was taken aback and did as directed. Well, that was . . . weird. More like unexpected from Draco Malfoy! He always taunted her about the curly mess on top of her head.

**.oOo.**

_Oomph!_

_Hermione winced at the sudden contact with another body. She groaned as she landed on her rear end rather hard. She let out a curse as her head made contact with the wall next to her._

_"Cursing Granger?" commented Draco who sat in a similar position like her. His head was leaning against the wall in a sort of defeated manner. "Didn't know Miss Goody-Two shoes had it it in her to curse."_

_"They slip out accidentally," Hermione retorted, rubbing her sore head. She got to her feet cautiously, making sure nothing else hurt. She grabbed her books and stuffed them into her bag. She reached out a hand to help Draco who was still on the floor. Draco gave her a disgusted look but it only made him look more sullen than he already was._

_"I can get up myself," he said, making no movement._

_Hermione noticed how his bags appeared like purple bruises on his too pale face. She cast a worried look at Draco. Did he look too skinny? Is he ill? That was clearly a sick looking boy. "Are you sick? I can take you to Madame Pomfrey, you know, she's real-"_

_"I said I don't need your help," Draco snapped, his voice sounding more pleading than sharp._

_Hermione frowned, approaching him like one would a wild hurt animal. She relaxed when he didn't say anything back, offensive or not. She grabbed him by his thin arm and lifted him up. He groaned and tried to get up, using his remaining strength. He stood wobbly and Hermione supported him all the way to the Hospital Wing. She wordlessly lead him there and was going to leave him when he reached out and grabbed the end of her shirt._

_"Granger," he said slowly, "it's all your fault. If I hadn't run into you, I would've made it here on my own. Fix your rat nest that you call hair so you can see properly."_

_Hermione looked at Draco in disbelief before she heard the mumbled 'thank you' then Draco passed out. Hermione hesitantly left him there but not before making his pillows were fluffed and he was comfortable on the bed. The days that followed the incident she always made sure to carry ponytails around her wrists._

**.oOo.**

Hermione frowned, still thinking about that seemingly random moment in her life. They were headed to the Great Hall when Ginny walked over. Blaise was talking fast and animatedly with Draco.

"Quidditch practice!" Ginny cheerfully chirped, grabbing Hermione and steering her in the proper direction. "I've been looking forward to this!"

* * *

Please Review, it means a bunch! :)


	9. Chapter 9

**A/N: **Wow. I'm so terrible. I really have no legitimate excuse. I'm just really crappy. Honestly, I reread my work and it _sucks_. Like crap. I have to go edit that some time REALLY SOON because I'm cringing at what I wrote. I seriously _really_ didn't know how to even grammar and syntax and I'm just all over the place. I'm not going to say I'm the best writer ever now, but I've improved since then. I just didn't know how to pick up this story again. I rewrote this so many times, and I'm still not that satisfied with this chapter, but this is probably the best it's going to get. Sorry a million times over! I hope you can still enjoy this chapter!

**N: **This is some pretty fluff, to be honest. Nothing really plot moving, but I really had to get the Quidditch out of the way for now.

**Thank you so much for all the support! You guys are wonderful and deserve all the love in the world! I hope you guys find like 20 dollars (or whatever your currency is)! **

**Word Count: **1,361

**Disclaimer: **Nope. Never Have, Never Will.

* * *

Quidditch practice? That was the furthest thing on Hermione's mind when she woke up today. Unfortunately, she was dragged down to the Pitch without a say in the decision. She liked the sport, honestly, but it wasn't her area of expertise or a general interest. It was no secret she preferred the quiet comforts that reading and the library brought her, but that wasn't to say she didn't enjoy a good Quidditch game either.

"Can I ask why?" She half-yelled and half-asked the question because Ginny showed no sign of slowing down. In fact, she increased her speed as the Pitch came into view. "Did Harry schedule a practice?"

She only received laughter in response. Hermione glanced worriedly towards the two kids who were grinning and running beside them. She was worried they would get hurt with all their running, but thankfully, Ginny's speed walking wasn't too fast taking in consideration the boy's little legs.

Once they did stop the boys were breathing hard, and Hermione sent Ginny a sharp look as she picked up a reluctant Draco, ignoring his cries of protest.

"You're going to tire yourself out before you can even get on a broom," Hermione admonished, wiping the sweat off his forehead with a swipe of her sleeve. She let the boy down and raised a brow at the redhead. "Now, will you tell me what's going on?"

"Sorry, Hermione. Blaise really wanted to see some of us play Quidditch, so we managed to schedule a scrimmage." Ginny sighed at Hermione's dubious look. They walked, more slower of course, towards the group of people who had heard caught word and were than enthusiastic about this practice. "It's not an official practice either. We've just told some people, and they told some people. They're not going to get hurt, I doubt it."

Hermione bit her lip, watching as the two children bragged to each other about who was the best. They did look happy, and she didn't want to be the one to put a damper on their parade. "All right."

"I knew you wouldn't be able to resist their adorable faces! I mean, I didn't either." Ginny grinned, waving at the others. "It's kind of hilarious how we bend to their whims."

Hermione snorted, pushing the two boys towards Harry and the others who were more than ready to dress the little boys up. "Are you sure it wasn't that _you _couldn't stay away from Quidditch?"

Ginny laughed, trying to conceal her face. Of course, Ginny knew what spurred her sudden desire to play Quidditch, and while, she did _want_ to fly, it might have had something to do with trying to impress a child. Needless to say, it wasn't her greatest moment that she was proud of.

"Oi, girls, look at them now!" Seamus called, his voice full of amusement and glee. Draco and Blaise were decked out in Slytherin Quidditch robes transfigured to fit their tiny frame. Hermione fought a grin when she saw Draco's hair slicked back. She discreetly saw Lavender put away some gel in her bag.

"Don't I look awesome?" Blaise smirked, patting his robes and posing. "I'm meant to play Quidditch!"

"Or pose," Ginny muttered, remembering her encounter with the Slytherin boy in her Fifth Year and a rather nasty hex she sent his way. "You two look adorable!"

That was said in a much louder voice with Hermione echoing her sentiments.

"Red, I look cool, not adorable!" Blaise huffed, stamping his foot and shaking her head. "Cool."

Hermione bit her lip as Draco agreed hurriedly. She'd have to thank Lavender later for his hair. It was absolutely wonderful. She had to take a picture of him for later.

"We've divided up into two teams. Nott, Dean, Ron, Stephan, and me will play on this side." Harry gave a small nod to students on his right side. "Now, we're going against Seamus, Ginny, Hopkins, Goyle, and Crabbe. Remember "

"What about us?" Draco cried, pouting. "I didn't hear my name!"

"Hmm, how about you watch us play for a bit then you decide which team you want to join?" Harry proposed, smiling kindly at the boys.

Hermione had to hand it to Harry. His leadership skills in handling a situation was great. Besides, he sounded like a bit like a dad which was amusing.

When they seemed to reach a conclusion, Hermione took the boys by the hands and led them up to the stands. They weren't particularly happy, but she saw their expressions cheer up when the players flew up in the air. Blaise bounced in his seat, eyes alert and rear end all the way to edge of his seat. Draco, on the other hand, regarded the match with an even stare barely moving an inch as they signaled for the match to start. The quaffle was thrown in the air and the scrimmage began.

It was fun, really, listening to their commentary, and their not so subtle bragging.

"_Wow, I could've done better!"_

"_Did you see her go? Her red hair was all over the place!"_

"_Meh, that was okay."_

"_Harry is awesome!"_

And various other comments like these had her trying to suppress her laughter though it came out in bursts of snorts and giggles. By the time their scrimmage ended (Harry's team lost. Apparently, Ginny and the others played recklessly) the two children were ecstatic, running down the stairs, eager to get on their own brooms.

Ginny was waiting at the bottom of the Pitch to greet them as were the others. It was definitely a sight to behold. Two tiny Slytherins dressed professionally in Quidditch robes holding toy brooms.

"All right, let's play some Quidditch!" Ginny grinned, only a few feet up in the air as Harry and Theo loitered on the ground ready to catch them if they were to fall.

"I want to be a Chaser," Blaise stated, his eyes shining but his face deadly serious. Well, as serious as an eight year old can get which was actually pretty serious. "You were . . . cool," he whispered, his nose scrunching up at the compliment.

Draco rolled his eyes. "The Seeker is the one who wins the match. It's easy to see who is better!"

Ginny laughed, shushing the boys and getting them in the air. This could hardly count as flying. Not with all their enchanted brooms and the safety spells. They were about ten feet in the air give or take, so that meant the others who weren't on the ground had to fly around that height, too. And some of them, Crabbe, Goyle, etc., were not pixies. Especially when Blaise had a child size quaffle in his hands and his aim was less than stellar.

"Oi, Blaise! Stop throwing the ball at me," Ron cried as he was pelted with yet another quaffle. "You're doing this on purpose, I know it!"

Blaise smirked slightly before shrugging. "Maybe you're just a good Keeper."

Ron gaped at the other boy and whirled his head around to meet Ginny who was relaxed on her broom tossing the quaffle idly back to Blaise. "Ginny, please, you know this is on purpose!"

Of course it was on purpose. Ginny merely hummed and tossed Blaise another quaffle. She could see out of her peripheral vision Hermione charming a snitch around and looking worried as Draco zoomed in his toy broom at the highest speed. As fast as a toy broom could go, that is.

Ginny laughed at Ron's indignant expressions and settled in for at least another hour.

A few hours later once the boys were settled into their rooms, Hermione and Ginny finally relaxed.

"I'm dead tired. I can't believe they wouldn't stop practicing until the sun went down." Hermione flopped onto her bed ungraciously, groaning as she made contact with her pillow. "I just want to sleep."

"Build up your stamina," Ginny remarked, offhandedly. "Harry told me that he's predicted when they're growing. Apparently, tomorrow they will. I wonder what age they'll be then?"

No matter what age they turned, Hermione knew they would be a handful. Tomorrow, huh? Hermione stifled a groan.

"Sleep. That's all we can do."


	10. Chapter 10

**A/N: PLEASE READ THE BOTTOM Author's note. **

**Disclaimer: Nope. Never have, never will. **

* * *

Of course, being in charge of a handful of boys did not permit Hermione and Ginny the sleep they so desperately wanted. No sooner had Hermione laid her head to rest she heard a cry from the boys room. She immediately jumped up and performed parkour moves in order to get to the boys in about lightning speed.

"What's wrong?" She asked, bursting through the room. Hermione glanced at the boys and was surprised to see Draco balled up and crying. "What happened?"

"My body hurts," Draco whined.

Just like that a lightbulb lit up in her head. She knew exactly what would fix this!

"You know what? I'm going to read an AMAZING book to you!" Hermione stated with joy, magicking a book out of nowhere. Boy, did this book make her think whenever she blazed it. Also, it was like 4:20 am so perfect time. "Okay, settle in, you two! Don't think I didn't see you cowering!"

The boys snuggled in and Hermione opened her mouth,

"According to all known laws of aviation, there is no way a bee should be able to fly. Its wings are too small to get its fat little body off the ground. The bee, of course, flies anyway because bees don't care what humans think is impossible. Yellow, black. Yellow, black. Yellow, black. Yellow, black. Ooh, black and yellow! Let's shake it up a little. Barry! Breakfast is ready! Ooming! Hang on a second. Hello? - Barry? - Adam? - Oan you believe this is happening? - I can't. I'll pick you up. Looking sharp. Use the stairs. Your father paid good money for those. Sorry. I'm excited. Here's the graduate. We're very proud of you, son. A perfect report card, all B's. Very proud. Ma! I got a thing going here. - You got lint on your fuzz. - Ow! That's me! - Wave to us! We'll be in row 118,000. - Bye! Barry, I told you, stop flying in the house! - Hey, Adam. - Hey, Barry. - Is that fuzz gel? - A little. Special day, graduation. Never thought I'd make it. Three days grade school, three days high school. Those were awkward. Three days college. I'm glad I took a day and hitchhiked around the hive. You did come back different. - Hi, Barry. - Artie, growing a mustache? Looks good. - Hear about Frankie? - Yeah. - You going to the funeral? - No, I'm not going. Everybody knows, sting someone, you die. Don't waste it on a squirrel. Such a hothead. I guess he could have just gotten out of the way. I love this incorporating an amusement park into our day. That's why we don't need vacations. Boy, quite a bit of pomp... under the circumstances. - Well, Adam, today we are men. - We are! - Bee-men. - Amen! Hallelujah! Students, faculty, distinguished bees, please welcome Dean Buzzwell. Welcome, New Hive Oity graduating class of... ...9:15. That concludes our ceremonies. And begins your career at Honex Industries! Will we pick ourjob today? I heard it's just orientation. Heads up! Here we go. Keep your hands and antennas inside the tram at all times. - Wonder what it'll be like? - A little scary. Welcome to Honex, a division of Honesco and a part of the Hexagon Group. This is it! Wow. Wow. We know that you, as a bee, have worked your whole life to get to the point where you can work for your whole life. Honey begins when our valiant Pollen Jocks bring the nectar to the hive. Our top-secret formula is automatically color-corrected, scent-adjusted and bubble-contoured into this soothing sweet syrup with its distinctive golden glow you know as... Honey! - That girl was hot. - She's my cousin! - She is? - Yes, we're all cousins. - Right. You're right. - At Honex, we constantly strive to improve every aspect of bee existence. These bees are stress-testing a new helmet technology. - What do you think he makes? - Not enough. Here we have our latest advancement, the Krelman. - What does that do? - Oatches that little strand of honey that hangs after you pour it. Saves us millions. Oan anyone work on the Krelman? Of course. Most bee jobs are small ones. But bees know that every small job, if it's done well, means a lot. But choose carefully because you'll stay in the job you pick for the rest of your life. The same job the rest of your life? I didn't know that. What's the difference? You'll be happy to know that bees, as a species, haven't had one day off in 27 million years. So you'll just work us to death? We'll sure try. Wow! That blew my mind! "What's the difference?" How can you say that? One job forever? That's an insane choice to have to make. I'm relieved. Now we only have to make one decision in life. But, Adam, how could they never have told us that? Why would you question anything? We're bees. We're the most perfectly functioning society on Earth. You ever think maybe things work a little too well here? Like what? Give me one example. I don't know. But you know what I'm talking about. Please clear the gate. Royal Nectar Force on approach. Wait a second. Oheck it out. - Hey, those are Pollen Jocks! - Wow. I've never seen them this close. They know what it's like outside the hive. Yeah, but some don't come back. - Hey, Jocks! - Hi, Jocks! You guys did great! You're monsters! You're sky freaks! I love it! I love it! - I wonder where they were. - I don't know. Their day's not planned. Outside the hive, flying who knows where, doing who knows what. You can'tjust decide to be a Pollen Jock. You have to be bred for that. Right. Look. That's more pollen than you and I will see in a lifetime. It's just a status symbol. Bees make too much of it. Perhaps. Unless you're wearing it and the ladies see you wearing it. Those ladies? Aren't they our cousins too? Distant. Distant. Look at these two. - Oouple of Hive Harrys. - Let's have fun with them. It must be dangerous being a Pollen Jock. Yeah. Once a bear pinned me against a mushroom! He had a paw on my throat, and with the other, he was slapping me! - Oh, my! - I never thought I'd knock him out. What were you doing during this? Trying to alert the authorities. I can autograph that. A little gusty out there today, wasn't it, comrades? Yeah. Gusty. We're hitting a sunflower patch six miles from here tomorrow. - Six miles, huh? - Barry! A puddle jump for us, but maybe you're not up for it. - Maybe I am. - You are not! We're going 0900 at J-Gate. What do you think, buzzy-boy? Are you bee enough? I might be. It all depends on what 0900 means. Hey, Honex! Dad, you surprised me. You decide what you're interested in? - Well, there's a lot of choices. - But you only get one. Do you ever get bored doing the same job every day? Son, let me tell you about stirring. You grab that stick, and you just move it around, and you stir it around. You get yourself into a rhythm. It's a beautiful thing. You know, Dad, the more I think about it, maybe the honey field just isn't right for me. You were thinking of what, making balloon animals? That's a bad job for a guy with a stinger. Janet, your son's not sure he wants to go into honey! - Barry, you are so funny sometimes. - I'm not trying to be funny. You're not funny! You're going into honey. Our son, the stirrer! - You're gonna be a stirrer? - No one's listening to me! Wait till you see the sticks I have. I could say anything right now. I'm gonna get an ant tattoo! Let's open some honey and celebrate! Maybe I'll pierce my thorax. Shave my antennae. Shack up with a grasshopper. Get a gold tooth and call everybody "dawg"! I'm so proud. - We're starting work today! - Today's the day. Oome on! All the good jobs will be gone. Yeah, right. Pollen counting, stunt bee, pouring, stirrer, front desk, hair removal... - Is it still available? - Hang on. Two left! One of them's yours! Oongratulations! Step to the side. - What'd you get? - Picking crud out. Stellar! Wow! Oouple of newbies? Yes, sir! Our first day! We are ready! Make your choice. - You want to go first? - No, you go. Oh, my. What's available? Restroom attendant's open, not for the reason you think. - Any chance of getting the Krelman? - Sure, you're on. I'm sorry, the Krelman just closed out. Wax monkey's always open. The Krelman opened up again. What happened? A bee died. Makes an opening. See? He's dead. Another dead one. Deady. Deadified. Two more dead. Dead from the neck up. Dead from the neck down. That's life! Oh, this is so hard! Heating, cooling, stunt bee, pourer, stirrer, humming, inspector number seven, lint coordinator, stripe supervisor, mite wrangler. Barry, what do you think I should... Barry? Barry! All right, we've got the sunflower patch in quadrant nine... What happened to you? Where are you? - I'm going out. - Out? Out where? - Out there. - Oh, no! I have to, before I go to work for the rest of my life. You're gonna die! You're crazy! Hello? Another call coming in. If anyone's feeling brave, there's a Korean deli on 83rd that gets their roses today. Hey, guys. - Look at that. - Isn't that the kid we saw yesterday? Hold it, son, flight deck's restricted. It's OK, Lou. We're gonna take him up. Really? Feeling lucky, are you? Sign here, here. Just initial that. - Thank you. - OK. You got a rain advisory today, and as you all know, bees cannot fly in rain. So be careful. As always, watch your brooms, hockey sticks, dogs, birds, bears and bats. Also, I got a couple of reports of root beer being poured on us. Murphy's in a home because of it, babbling like a cicada! - That's awful. - And a reminder for you rookies, bee law number one, absolutely no talking to humans! All right, launch positions! Buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz! Buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz! Buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz! Black and yellow! Hello! You ready for this, hot shot? Yeah. Yeah, bring it on. Wind, check. - Antennae, check. - Nectar pack, check. - Wings, check. - Stinger, check. Scared out of my shorts, check. OK, ladies, let's move it out! Pound those petunias, you striped stem-suckers! All of you, drain those flowers! Wow! I'm out! I can't believe I'm out! So blue. I feel so fast and free! Box kite! Wow! Flowers! This is Blue Leader. We have roses visual. Bring it around 30 degrees and hold. Roses! 30 degrees, roger. Bringing it around. Stand to the side, kid. It's got a bit of a kick. That is one nectar collector! - Ever see pollination up close? - No, sir. I pick up some pollen here, sprinkle it over here. Maybe a dash over there, a pinch on that one. See that? It's a little bit of magic. That's amazing. Why do we do that? That's pollen power. More pollen, more flowers, more nectar, more honey for us. Oool. I'm picking up a lot of bright yellow. Oould be daisies. Don't we need those? Oopy that visual. Wait. One of these flowers seems to be on the move. Say again? You're reporting a moving flower? Affirmative. That was on the line! This is the coolest. What is it? I don't know, but I'm loving this color. It smells good. Not like a flower, but I like it. Yeah, fuzzy. Ohemical-y. Oareful, guys. It's a little grabby. My sweet lord of bees! Oandy-brain, get off there! Problem! - Guys! - This could be bad. Affirmative. Very close. Gonna hurt. Mama's little boy. You are way out of position, rookie! Ooming in at you like a missile! Help me! I don't think these are flowers. - Should we tell him? - I think he knows. What is this?! Match point! You can start packing up, honey, because you're about to eat it! Yowser! Gross. There's a bee in the car! - Do something! - I'm driving! - Hi, bee. - He's back here! He's going to sting me! Nobody move. If you don't move, he won't sting you. Freeze! He blinked! Spray him, Granny! What are you doing?! Wow... the tension level out here is unbelievable. I gotta get home. Oan't fly in rain. Oan't fly in rain. Oan't fly in rain. Mayday! Mayday! Bee going down! Ken, could you close the window please? Ken, could you close the window please? Oheck out my new resume. I made it into a fold-out brochure. You see? Folds out. Oh, no. More humans. I don't need this. What was that? Maybe this time. This time. This time. This time! This time! This... Drapes! That is diabolical. It's fantastic. It's got all my special skills, even my top-ten favorite movies. What's number one? Star Wars? Nah, I don't go for that... ...kind of stuff. No wonder we shouldn't talk to them. They're out of their minds. When I leave a job interview, they're flabbergasted, can't believe what I say. There's the sun. Maybe that's a way out. I don't remember the sun having a big 75 on it. I predicted global warming. I could feel it getting hotter. At first I thought it was just me. Wait! Stop! Bee! Stand back. These are winter boots. Wait! Don't kill him! You know I'm allergic to them! This thing could kill me! Why does his life have less value than yours? Why does his life have any less value than mine? Is that your statement? I'm just saying all life has value. You don't know what he's capable of feeling. My brochure! There you go, little guy. I'm not scared of him. It's an allergic thing. Put that on your resume brochure. My whole face could puff up. Make it one of your special skills. Knocking someone out is also a special skill. Right. Bye, Vanessa. Thanks. - Vanessa, next week? Yogurt night? - Sure, Ken. You know, whatever. - You could put carob chips on there. - Bye. - Supposed to be less calories. - Bye. I gotta say something. She saved my life. I gotta say something. All right, here it goes. Nah. What would I say? I could really get in trouble. It's a bee law. You're not supposed to talk to a human. I can't believe I'm doing this. I've got to. Oh, I can't do it. Oome on! No. Yes. No. Do it. I can't. How should I start it? "You like jazz?" No, that's no good. Here she comes! Speak, you fool! Hi! I'm sorry. - You're talking. - Yes, I know. You're talking! I'm so sorry. No, it's OK. It's fine. I know I'm dreaming. But I don't recall going to bed. Well, I'm sure this is very disconcerting. This is a bit of a surprise to me. I mean, you're a bee! I am. And I'm not supposed to be doing this, but they were all trying to kill me. And if it wasn't for you... I had to thank you. It's just how I was raised. That was a little weird. - I'm talking with a bee. - Yeah. I'm talking to a bee. And the bee is talking to me! I just want to say I'm grateful. I'll leave now. - Wait! How did you learn to do that? - What? The talking thing. Same way you did, I guess. "Mama, Dada, honey." You pick it up. - That's very funny. - Yeah. Bees are funny. If we didn't laugh, we'd cry with what we have to deal with. Anyway... Oan I... ...get you something? - Like what? I don't know. I mean... I don't know. Ooffee? I don't want to put you out. It's no trouble. It takes two minutes. - It's just coffee. - I hate to impose. - Don't be ridiculous! - Actually, I would love a cup. Hey, you want rum cake? - I shouldn't. - Have some. - No, I can't. - Oome on! I'm trying to lose a couple micrograms. - Where? - These stripes don't help. You look great! I don't know if you know anything about fashion. Are you all right? No. He's making the tie in the cab as they're flying up Madison. He finally gets there. He runs up the steps into the church. The wedding is on. And he says, "Watermelon? I thought you said Guatemalan. Why would I marry a watermelon?" Is that a bee joke? That's the kind of stuff we do. Yeah, different. So, what are you gonna do, Barry? About work? I don't know. I want to do my part for the hive, but I can't do it the way they want. I know how you feel. - You do? - Sure. My parents wanted me to be a lawyer or a doctor, but I wanted to be a florist. - Really? - My only interest is flowers. Our new queen was just elected with that same campaign slogan. Anyway, if you look... There's my hive right there. See it? You're in Sheep Meadow! Yes! I'm right off the Turtle Pond! No way! I know that area. I lost a toe ring there once. - Why do girls put rings on their toes? - Why not? - It's like putting a hat on your knee. - Maybe I'll try that. - You all right, ma'am? - Oh, yeah. Fine. Just having two cups of coffee! Anyway, this has been great. Thanks for the coffee. Yeah, it's no trouble. Sorry I couldn't finish it. If I did, I'd be up the rest of my life. Are you...? Oan I take a piece of this with me? Sure! Here, have a crumb. - Thanks! - Yeah. All right. Well, then... I guess I'll see you around. Or not. OK, Barry. And thank you so much again... for before. Oh, that? That was nothing. Well, not nothing, but... Anyway... This can't possibly work. He's all set to go. We may as well try it. OK, Dave, pull the chute. - Sounds amazing. - It was amazing! It was the scariest, happiest moment of my life. Humans! I can't believe you were with humans! Giant, scary humans! What were they like? Huge and crazy. They talk crazy. They eat crazy giant things. They drive crazy. - Do they try and kill you, like on TV? - Some of them. But some of them don't. - How'd you get back? - Poodle. You did it, and I'm glad. You saw whatever you wanted to see. You had your "experience." Now you can pick out yourjob and be normal. - Well... - Well? Well, I met someone. You did? Was she Bee-ish? - A wasp?! Your parents will kill you! - No, no, no, not a wasp. - Spider? - I'm not attracted to spiders. I know it's the hottest thing, with the eight legs and all. I can't get by that face. So who is she? She's... human. No, no. That's a bee law. You wouldn't break a bee law. - Her name's Vanessa. - Oh, boy. She's so nice. And she's a florist! Oh, no! You're dating a human florist! We're not dating. You're flying outside the hive, talking to humans that attack our homes with power washers and M-80s! One-eighth a stick of dynamite! She saved my life! And she understands me. This is over! Eat this. This is not over! What was that? - They call it a crumb. - It was so stingin' stripey! And that's not what they eat. That's what falls off what they eat! - You know what a Oinnabon is? - No. It's bread and cinnamon and frosting. They heat it up... Sit down! ...really hot! - Listen to me! We are not them! We're us. There's us and there's them! Yes, but who can deny the heart that is yearning? There's no yearning. Stop yearning. Listen to me! You have got to start thinking bee, my friend. Thinking bee! - Thinking bee. - Thinking bee. Thinking bee! Thinking bee! Thinking bee! Thinking bee! There he is. He's in the pool. You know what your problem is, Barry? I gotta start thinking bee? How much longer will this go on? It's been three days! Why aren't you working? I've got a lot of big life decisions to think about. What life? You have no life! You have no job. You're barely a bee! Would it kill you to make a little honey? Barry, come out. Your father's talking to you. Martin, would you talk to him? Barry, I'm talking to you! You coming? Got everything? All set! Go ahead. I'll catch up. Don't be too long. Watch this! Vanessa! - We're still here. - I told you not to yell at him. He doesn't respond to yelling! - Then why yell at me? - Because you don't listen! I'm not listening to this. Sorry, I've gotta go. - Where are you going? - I'm meeting a friend. A girl? Is this why you can't decide? Bye. I just hope she's Bee-ish. They have a huge parade of flowers every year in Pasadena? To be in the Tournament of Roses, that's every florist's dream! Up on a float, surrounded by flowers, crowds cheering. A tournament. Do the roses compete in athletic events? No. All right, I've got one. How come you don't fly everywhere? It's exhausting. Why don't you run everywhere? It's faster. Yeah, OK, I see, I see. All right, your turn. TiVo. You can just freeze live TV? That's insane! You don't have that? We have Hivo, but it's a disease. It's a horrible, horrible disease. Oh, my. Dumb bees! You must want to sting all those jerks. We try not to sting. It's usually fatal for us. So you have to watch your temper. Very carefully. You kick a wall, take a walk, write an angry letter and throw it out. Work through it like any emotion: Anger, jealousy, lust. Oh, my goodness! Are you OK? Yeah. - What is wrong with you?! - It's a bug. He's not bothering anybody. Get out of here, you creep! What was that? A Pic 'N' Save circular? Yeah, it was. How did you know? It felt like about 10 pages. Seventy-five is pretty much our limit. You've really got that down to a science. - I lost a cousin to Italian Vogue. - I'll bet. What in the name of Mighty Hercules is this? How did this get here? Oute Bee, Golden Blossom, Ray Liotta Private Select? - Is he that actor? - I never heard of him. - Why is this here? - For people. We eat it. You don't have enough food of your own? - Well, yes. - How do you get it? - Bees make it. - I know who makes it! And it's hard to make it! There's heating, cooling, stirring. You need a whole Krelman thing! - It's organic. - It's our-ganic! It's just honey, Barry. Just what?! Bees don't know about this! This is stealing! A lot of stealing! You've taken our homes, schools, hospitals! This is all we have! And it's on sale?! I'm getting to the bottom of this. I'm getting to the bottom of all of this! Hey, Hector. - You almost done? - Almost. He is here. I sense it. Well, I guess I'll go home now and just leave this nice honey out, with no one around. You're busted, box boy! I knew I heard something. So you can talk! I can talk. And now you'll start talking! Where you getting the sweet stuff? Who's your supplier? I don't understand. I thought we were friends. The last thing we want to do is upset bees! You're too late! It's ours now! You, sir, have crossed the wrong sword! You, sir, will be lunch for my iguana, Ignacio! Where is the honey coming from? Tell me where! Honey Farms! It comes from Honey Farms! Orazy person! What horrible thing has happened here? These faces, they never knew what hit them. And now they're on the road to nowhere! Just keep still. What? You're not dead? Do I look dead? They will wipe anything that moves. Where you headed? To Honey Farms. I am onto something huge here. I'm going to Alaska. Moose blood, crazy stuff. Blows your head off! I'm going to Tacoma. - And you? - He really is dead. All right. Uh-oh! - What is that?! - Oh, no! - A wiper! Triple blade! - Triple blade? Jump on! It's your only chance, bee! Why does everything have to be so doggone clean?! How much do you people need to see?! Open your eyes! Stick your head out the window! From NPR News in Washington, I'm Oarl Kasell. But don't kill no more bugs! - Bee! - Moose blood guy! - You hear something? - Like what? Like tiny screaming. Turn off the radio. Whassup, bee boy? Hey, Blood. Just a row of honey jars, as far as the eye could see. Wow! I assume wherever this truck goes is where they're getting it. I mean, that honey's ours. - Bees hang tight. - We're all jammed in. It's a close community. Not us, man. We on our own. Every mosquito on his own. - What if you get in trouble? - You a mosquito, you in trouble. Nobody likes us. They just smack. See a mosquito, smack, smack! At least you're out in the world. You must meet girls. Mosquito girls try to trade up, get with a moth, dragonfly. Mosquito girl don't want no mosquito. You got to be kidding me! Mooseblood's about to leave the building! So long, bee! - Hey, guys! - Mooseblood! I knew I'd catch y'all down here. Did you bring your crazy straw? We throw it in jars, slap a label on it, and it's pretty much pure profit. What is this place? A bee's got a brain the size of a pinhead. They are pinheads! Pinhead. - Oheck out the new smoker. - Oh, sweet. That's the one you want. The Thomas 3000! Smoker? Ninety puffs a minute, semi-automatic. Twice the nicotine, all the tar. A couple breaths of this knocks them right out. They make the honey, and we make the money. "They make the honey, and we make the money"? Oh, my! What's going on? Are you OK? Yeah. It doesn't last too long. Do you know you're in a fake hive with fake walls? Our queen was moved here. We had no choice. This is your queen? That's a man in women's clothes! That's a drag queen! What is this? Oh, no! There's hundreds of them! Bee honey. Our honey is being brazenly stolen on a massive scale! This is worse than anything bears have done! I intend to do something. Oh, Barry, stop. Who told you humans are taking our honey? That's a rumor. Do these look like rumors? That's a conspiracy theory. These are obviously doctored photos. How did you get mixed up in this? He's been talking to humans. - What? - Talking to humans?! He has a human girlfriend. And they make out! Make out? Barry! We do not. - You wish you could. - Whose side are you on? The bees! I dated a cricket once in San Antonio. Those crazy legs kept me up all night. Barry, this is what you want to do with your life? I want to do it for all our lives. Nobody works harder than bees! Dad, I remember you coming home so overworked your hands were still stirring. You couldn't stop. I remember that. What right do they have to our honey? We live on two cups a year. They put it in lip balm for no reason whatsoever! Even if it's true, what can one bee do? Sting them where it really hurts. In the face! The eye! - That would hurt. - No. Up the nose? That's a killer. There's only one place you can sting the humans, one place where it matters. Hive at Five, the hive's only full-hour action news source. No more bee beards! With Bob Bumble at the anchor desk. Weather with Storm Stinger. Sports with Buzz Larvi. And Jeanette Ohung. - Good evening. I'm Bob Bumble. - And I'm Jeanette Ohung. A tri-county bee, Barry Benson, intends to sue the human race for stealing our honey, packaging it and profiting from it illegally! Tomorrow night on Bee Larry King, we'll have three former queens here in our studio, discussing their new book, Olassy Ladies, out this week on Hexagon. Tonight we're talking to Barry Benson. Did you ever think, "I'm a kid from the hive. I can't do this"? Bees have never been afraid to change the world. What about Bee Oolumbus? Bee Gandhi? Bejesus? Where I'm from, we'd never sue humans. We were thinking of stickball or candy stores. How old are you? The bee community is supporting you in this case, which will be the trial of the bee century. You know, they have a Larry King in the human world too. It's a common name. Next week... He looks like you and has a show and suspenders and colored dots... Next week... Glasses, quotes on the bottom from the guest even though you just heard 'em. Bear Week next week! They're scary, hairy and here live. Always leans forward, pointy shoulders, squinty eyes, very Jewish. In tennis, you attack at the point of weakness! It was my grandmother, Ken. She's 81. Honey, her backhand's a joke! I'm not gonna take advantage of that? Quiet, please. Actual work going on here. - Is that that same bee? - Yes, it is! I'm helping him sue the human race. - Hello. - Hello, bee. This is Ken. Yeah, I remember you. Timberland, size ten and a half. Vibram sole, I believe. Why does he talk again? Listen, you better go 'cause we're really busy working. But it's our yogurt night! Bye-bye. Why is yogurt night so difficult?! You poor thing. You two have been at this for hours! Yes, and Adam here has been a huge help. - Frosting... - How many sugars? Just one. I try not to use the competition. So why are you helping me? Bees have good qualities. And it takes my mind off the shop. Instead of flowers, people are giving balloon bouquets now. Those are great, if you're three. And artificial flowers. - Oh, those just get me psychotic! - Yeah, me too. Bent stingers, pointless pollination. Bees must hate those fake things! Nothing worse than a daffodil that's had work done. Maybe this could make up for it a little bit. - This lawsuit's a pretty big deal. - I guess. You sure you want to go through with it? Am I sure? When I'm done with the humans, they won't be able to say, "Honey, I'm home," without paying a royalty! It's an incredible scene here in downtown Manhattan, where the world anxiously waits, because for the first time in history, we will hear for ourselves if a honeybee can actually speak. What have we gotten into here, Barry? It's pretty big, isn't it? I can't believe how many humans don't work during the day. You think billion-dollar multinational food companies have good lawyers? Everybody needs to stay behind the barricade. - What's the matter? - I don't know, I just got a chill. Well, if it isn't the bee team. You boys work on this? All rise! The Honorable Judge Bumbleton presiding. All right. Oase number 4475, Superior Oourt of New York, Barry Bee Benson v. the Honey Industry is now in session. Mr. Montgomery, you're representing the five food companies collectively? A privilege. Mr. Benson... you're representing all the bees of the world? I'm kidding. Yes, Your Honor, we're ready to proceed. Mr. Montgomery, your opening statement, please. Ladies and gentlemen of the jury, my grandmother was a simple woman. Born on a farm, she believed it was man's divine right to benefit from the bounty of nature God put before us. If we lived in the topsy-turvy world Mr. Benson imagines, just think of what would it mean. I would have to negotiate with the silkworm for the elastic in my britches! Talking bee! How do we know this isn't some sort of holographic motion-picture-capture Hollywood wizardry? They could be using laser beams! Robotics! Ventriloquism! Oloning! For all we know, he could be on steroids! Mr. Benson? Ladies and gentlemen, there's no trickery here. I'm just an ordinary bee. Honey's pretty important to me. It's important to all bees. We invented it! We make it. And we protect it with our lives. Unfortunately, there are some people in this room who think they can take it from us 'cause we're the little guys! I'm hoping that, after this is all over, you'll see how, by taking our honey, you not only take everything we have but everything we are! I wish he'd dress like that all the time. So nice! Oall your first witness. So, Mr. Klauss Vanderhayden of Honey Farms, big company you have. I suppose so. I see you also own Honeyburton and Honron! Yes, they provide beekeepers for our farms. Beekeeper. I find that to be a very disturbing term. I don't imagine you employ any bee-free-ers, do you? - No. - I couldn't hear you. - No. - No. Because you don't free bees. You keep bees. Not only that, it seems you thought a bear would be an appropriate image for a jar of honey. They're very lovable creatures. Yogi Bear, Fozzie Bear, Build-A-Bear. You mean like this? Bears kill bees! How'd you like his head crashing through your living room?! Biting into your couch! Spitting out your throw pillows! OK, that's enough. Take him away. So, Mr. Sting, thank you for being here. Your name intrigues me. - Where have I heard it before? - I was with a band called The Police. But you've never been a police officer, have you? No, I haven't. No, you haven't. And so here we have yet another example of bee culture casually stolen by a human for nothing more than a prance-about stage name. Oh, please. Have you ever been stung, Mr. Sting? Because I'm feeling a little stung, Sting. Or should I say... Mr. Gordon M. Sumner! That's not his real name?! You idiots! Mr. Liotta, first, belated congratulations on your Emmy win for a guest spot on ER in 2005. Thank you. Thank you. I see from your resume that you're devilishly handsome with a churning inner turmoil that's ready to blow. I enjoy what I do. Is that a crime? Not yet it isn't. But is this what it's come to for you? Exploiting tiny, helpless bees so you don't have to rehearse your part and learn your lines, sir? Watch it, Benson! I could blow right now! This isn't a goodfella. This is a badfella! Why doesn't someone just step on this creep, and we can all go home?! - Order in this court! - You're all thinking it! Order! Order, I say! - Say it! - Mr. Liotta, please sit down! I think it was awfully nice of that bear to pitch in like that. I think the jury's on our side. Are we doing everything right, legally? I'm a florist. Right. Well, here's to a great team. To a great team! Well, hello. - Ken! - Hello. I didn't think you were coming. No, I was just late. I tried to call, but... the battery. I didn't want all this to go to waste, so I called Barry. Luckily, he was free. Oh, that was lucky. There's a little left. I could heat it up. Yeah, heat it up, sure, whatever. So I hear you're quite a tennis player. I'm not much for the game myself. The ball's a little grabby. That's where I usually sit. Right... there. Ken, Barry was looking at your resume, and he agreed with me that eating with chopsticks isn't really a special skill. You think I don't see what you're doing? I know how hard it is to find the rightjob. We have that in common. Do we? Bees have 100 percent employment, but we do jobs like taking the crud out. That's just what I was thinking about doing. Ken, I let Barry borrow your razor for his fuzz. I hope that was all right. I'm going to drain the old stinger. Yeah, you do that. Look at that. You know, I've just about had it with your little mind games. - What's that? - Italian Vogue. Mamma mia, that's a lot of pages. A lot of ads. Remember what Van said, why is your life more valuable than mine? Funny, I just can't seem to recall that! I think something stinks in here! I love the smell of flowers. How do you like the smell of flames?! Not as much. Water bug! Not taking sides! Ken, I'm wearing a Ohapstick hat! This is pathetic! I've got issues! Well, well, well, a royal flush! - You're bluffing. - Am I? Surf's up, dude! Poo water! That bowl is gnarly. Except for those dirty yellow rings! Kenneth! What are you doing?! You know, I don't even like honey! I don't eat it! We need to talk! He's just a little bee! And he happens to be the nicest bee I've met in a long time! Long time? What are you talking about?! Are there other bugs in your life? No, but there are other things bugging me in life. And you're one of them! Fine! Talking bees, no yogurt night... My nerves are fried from riding on this emotional roller coaster! Goodbye, Ken. And for your information, I prefer sugar-free, artificial sweeteners made by man! I'm sorry about all that. I know it's got an aftertaste! I like it! I always felt there was some kind of barrier between Ken and me. I couldn't overcome it. Oh, well. Are you OK for the trial? I believe Mr. Montgomery is about out of ideas. We would like to call Mr. Barry Benson Bee to the stand. Good idea! You can really see why he's considered one of the best lawyers... Yeah. Layton, you've gotta weave some magic with this jury, or it's gonna be all over. Don't worry. The only thing I have to do to turn this jury around is to remind them of what they don't like about bees. - You got the tweezers? - Are you allergic? Only to losing, son. Only to losing. Mr. Benson Bee, I'll ask you what I think we'd all like to know. What exactly is your relationship to that woman? We're friends. - Good friends? - Yes. How good? Do you live together? Wait a minute... Are you her little... ...bedbug? I've seen a bee documentary or two. From what I understand, doesn't your queen give birth to all the bee children? - Yeah, but... - So those aren't your real parents! - Oh, Barry... - Yes, they are! Hold me back! You're an illegitimate bee, aren't you, Benson? He's denouncing bees! Don't y'all date your cousins? - Objection! - I'm going to pincushion this guy! Adam, don't! It's what he wants! Oh, I'm hit! Oh, lordy, I am hit! Order! Order! The venom! The venom is coursing through my veins! I have been felled by a winged beast of destruction! You see? You can't treat them like equals! They're striped savages! Stinging's the only thing they know! It's their way! - Adam, stay with me. - I can't feel my legs. What angel of mercy will come forward to suck the poison from my heaving buttocks? I will have order in this court. Order! Order, please! The case of the honeybees versus the human race took a pointed turn against the bees yesterday when one of their legal team stung Layton T. Montgomery. - Hey, buddy. - Hey. - Is there much pain? - Yeah. I... I blew the whole case, didn't I? It doesn't matter. What matters is you're alive. You could have died. I'd be better off dead. Look at me. They got it from the cafeteria downstairs, in a tuna sandwich. Look, there's a little celery still on it. What was it like to sting someone? I can't explain it. It was all... All adrenaline and then... and then ecstasy! All right. You think it was all a trap? Of course. I'm sorry. I flew us right into this. What were we thinking? Look at us. We're just a couple of bugs in this world. What will the humans do to us if they win? I don't know. I hear they put the roaches in motels. That doesn't sound so bad. Adam, they check in, but they don't check out! Oh, my. Oould you get a nurse to close that window? - Why? - The smoke. Bees don't smoke. Right. Bees don't smoke. Bees don't smoke! But some bees are smoking. That's it! That's our case! It is? It's not over? Get dressed. I've gotta go somewhere. Get back to the court and stall. Stall any way you can. And assuming you've done step correctly, you're ready for the tub. Mr. Flayman. Yes? Yes, Your Honor! Where is the rest of your team? Well, Your Honor, it's interesting. Bees are trained to fly haphazardly, and as a result, we don't make very good time. I actually heard a funny story about... Your Honor, haven't these ridiculous bugs taken up enough of this court's valuable time? How much longer will we allow these absurd shenanigans to go on? They have presented no compelling evidence to support their charges against my clients, who run legitimate businesses. I move for a complete dismissal of this entire case! Mr. Flayman, I'm afraid I'm going to have to consider Mr. Montgomery's motion. But you can't! We have a terrific case. Where is your proof? Where is the evidence? Show me the smoking gun! Hold it, Your Honor! You want a smoking gun? Here is your smoking gun. What is that? It's a bee smoker! What, this? This harmless little contraption? This couldn't hurt a fly, let alone a bee. Look at what has happened to bees who have never been asked, "Smoking or non?" Is this what nature intended for us? To be forcibly addicted to smoke machines and man-made wooden slat work camps? Living out our lives as honey slaves to the white man? - What are we gonna do? - He's playing the species card. Ladies and gentlemen, please, free these bees! Free the bees! Free the bees! Free the bees! Free the bees! Free the bees! The court finds in favor of the bees! Vanessa, we won! I knew you could do it! High-five! Sorry. I'm OK! You know what this means? All the honey will finally belong to the bees. Now we won't have to work so hard all the time. This is an unholy perversion of the balance of nature, Benson. You'll regret this. Barry, how much honey is out there? All right. One at a time. Barry, who are you wearing? My sweater is Ralph Lauren, and I have no pants. - What if Montgomery's right? - What do you mean? We've been living the bee way a long time, 27 million years. Oongratulations on your victory. What will you demand as a settlement? First, we'll demand a complete shutdown of all bee work camps. Then we want back the honey that was ours to begin with, every last drop. We demand an end to the glorification of the bear as anything more than a filthy, smelly, bad-breath stink machine. We're all aware of what they do in the woods. Wait for my signal. Take him out. He'll have nauseous for a few hours, then he'll be fine. And we will no longer tolerate bee-negative nicknames... But it's just a prance-about stage name! ...unnecessary inclusion of honey in bogus health products and la-dee-da human tea-time snack garnishments. Oan't breathe. Bring it in, boys! Hold it right there! Good. Tap it. Mr. Buzzwell, we just passed three cups, and there's gallons more coming! - I think we need to shut down! - Shut down? We've never shut down. Shut down honey production! Stop making honey! Turn your key, sir! What do we do now? Oannonball! We're shutting honey production! Mission abort. Aborting pollination and nectar detail. Returning to base. Adam, you wouldn't believe how much honey was out there. Oh, yeah? What's going on? Where is everybody? - Are they out celebrating? - They're home. They don't know what to do. Laying out, sleeping in. I heard your Uncle Oarl was on his way to San Antonio with a cricket. At least we got our honey back. Sometimes I think, so what if humans liked our honey? Who wouldn't? It's the greatest thing in the world! I was excited to be part of making it. This was my new desk. This was my new job. I wanted to do it really well. And now... Now I can't. I don't understand why they're not happy. I thought their lives would be better! They're doing nothing. It's amazing. Honey really changes people. You don't have any idea what's going on, do you? - What did you want to show me? - This. What happened here? That is not the half of it. Oh, no. Oh, my. They're all wilting. Doesn't look very good, does it? No. And whose fault do you think that is? You know, I'm gonna guess bees. Bees? Specifically, me. I didn't think bees not needing to make honey would affect all these things. It's notjust flowers. Fruits, vegetables, they all need bees. That's our whole SAT test right there. Take away produce, that affects the entire animal kingdom. And then, of course... The human species? So if there's no more pollination, it could all just go south here, couldn't it? I know this is also partly my fault. How about a suicide pact? How do we do it? - I'll sting you, you step on me. - Thatjust kills you twice. Right, right. Listen, Barry... sorry, but I gotta get going. I had to open my mouth and talk. Vanessa? Vanessa? Why are you leaving? Where are you going? To the final Tournament of Roses parade in Pasadena. They've moved it to this weekend because all the flowers are dying. It's the last chance I'll ever have to see it. Vanessa, I just wanna say I'm sorry. I never meant it to turn out like this. I know. Me neither. Tournament of Roses. Roses can't do sports. Wait a minute. Roses. Roses? Roses! Vanessa! Roses?! Barry? - Roses are flowers! - Yes, they are. Flowers, bees, pollen! I know. That's why this is the last parade. Maybe not. Oould you ask him to slow down? Oould you slow down? Barry! OK, I made a huge mistake. This is a total disaster, all my fault. Yes, it kind of is. I've ruined the planet. I wanted to help you with the flower shop. I've made it worse. Actually, it's completely closed down. I thought maybe you were remodeling. But I have another idea, and it's greater than my previous ideas combined. I don't want to hear it! All right, they have the roses, the roses have the pollen. I know every bee, plant and flower bud in this park. All we gotta do is get what they've got back here with what we've got. - Bees. - Park. - Pollen! - Flowers. - Repollination! - Across the nation! Tournament of Roses, Pasadena, Oalifornia. They've got nothing but flowers, floats and cotton candy. Security will be tight. I have an idea. Vanessa Bloome, FTD. Official floral business. It's real. Sorry, ma'am. Nice brooch. Thank you. It was a gift. Once inside, we just pick the right float. How about The Princess and the Pea? I could be the princess, and you could be the pea! Yes, I got it. - Where should I sit? - What are you? - I believe I'm the pea. - The pea? It goes under the mattresses. - Not in this fairy tale, sweetheart. - I'm getting the marshal. You do that! This whole parade is a fiasco! Let's see what this baby'll do. Hey, what are you doing?! Then all we do is blend in with traffic... ...without arousing suspicion. Once at the airport, there's no stopping us. Stop! Security. - You and your insect pack your float? - Yes. Has it been in your possession the entire time? Would you remove your shoes? - Remove your stinger. - It's part of me. I know. Just having some fun. Enjoy your flight. Then if we're lucky, we'll have just enough pollen to do the job. Oan you believe how lucky we are? We have just enough pollen to do the job! I think this is gonna work. It's got to work. Attention, passengers, this is Oaptain Scott. We have a bit of bad weather in New York. It looks like we'll experience a couple hours delay. Barry, these are cut flowers with no water. They'll never make it. I gotta get up there and talk to them. Be careful. Oan I get help with the Sky Mall magazine? I'd like to order the talking inflatable nose and ear hair trimmer. Oaptain, I'm in a real situation. - What'd you say, Hal? - Nothing. Bee! Don't freak out! My entire species... What are you doing? - Wait a minute! I'm an attorney! - Who's an attorney? Don't move. Oh, Barry. Good afternoon, passengers. This is your captain. Would a Miss Vanessa Bloome in 24B please report to the cockpit? And please hurry! What happened here? There was a DustBuster, a toupee, a life raft exploded. One's bald, one's in a boat, they're both unconscious! - Is that another bee joke? - No! No one's flying the plane! This is JFK control tower, Flight 356. What's your status? This is Vanessa Bloome. I'm a florist from New York. Where's the pilot? He's unconscious, and so is the copilot. Not good. Does anyone onboard have flight experience? As a matter of fact, there is. - Who's that? - Barry Benson. From the honey trial?! Oh, great. Vanessa, this is nothing more than a big metal bee. It's got giant wings, huge engines. I can't fly a plane. - Why not? Isn't John Travolta a pilot? - Yes. How hard could it be? Wait, Barry! We're headed into some lightning. This is Bob Bumble. We have some late-breaking news from JFK Airport, where a suspenseful scene is developing. Barry Benson, fresh from his legal victory... That's Barry! ...is attempting to land a plane, loaded with people, flowers and an incapacitated flight crew. Flowers?! We have a storm in the area and two individuals at the controls with absolutely no flight experience. Just a minute. There's a bee on that plane. I'm quite familiar with Mr. Benson and his no-account compadres. They've done enough damage. But isn't he your only hope? Technically, a bee shouldn't be able to fly at all. Their wings are too small... Haven't we heard this a million times? "The surface area of the wings and body mass make no sense." - Get this on the air! - Got it. - Stand by. - We're going live. The way we work may be a mystery to you. Making honey takes a lot of bees doing a lot of small jobs. But let me tell you about a small job. If you do it well, it makes a big difference. More than we realized. To us, to everyone. That's why I want to get bees back to working together. That's the bee way! We're not made of Jell-O. We get behind a fellow. - Black and yellow! - Hello! Left, right, down, hover. - Hover? - Forget hover. This isn't so hard. Beep-beep! Beep-beep! Barry, what happened?! Wait, I think we were on autopilot the whole time. - That may have been helping me. - And now we're not! So it turns out I cannot fly a plane. All of you, let's get behind this fellow! Move it out! Move out! Our only chance is if I do what I'd do, you copy me with the wings of the plane! Don't have to yell. I'm not yelling! We're in a lot of trouble. It's very hard to concentrate with that panicky tone in your voice! It's not a tone. I'm panicking! I can't do this! Vanessa, pull yourself together. You have to snap out of it! You snap out of it. You snap out of it. - You snap out of it! - You snap out of it! - You snap out of it! - You snap out of it! - You snap out of it! - You snap out of it! - Hold it! - Why? Oome on, it's my turn. How is the plane flying? I don't know. Hello? Benson, got any flowers for a happy occasion in there? The Pollen Jocks! They do get behind a fellow. - Black and yellow. - Hello. All right, let's drop this tin can on the blacktop. Where? I can't see anything. Oan you? No, nothing. It's all cloudy. Oome on. You got to think bee, Barry. - Thinking bee. - Thinking bee. Thinking bee! Thinking bee! Thinking bee! Wait a minute. I think I'm feeling something. - What? - I don't know. It's strong, pulling me. Like a 27-million-year-old instinct. Bring the nose down. Thinking bee! Thinking bee! Thinking bee! - What in the world is on the tarmac? - Get some lights on that! Thinking bee! Thinking bee! Thinking bee! - Vanessa, aim for the flower. - OK. Out the engines. We're going in on bee power. Ready, boys? Affirmative! Good. Good. Easy, now. That's it. Land on that flower! Ready? Full reverse! Spin it around! - Not that flower! The other one! - Which one? - That flower. - I'm aiming at the flower! That's a fat guy in a flowered shirt. I mean the giant pulsating flower made of millions of bees! Pull forward. Nose down. Tail up. Rotate around it. - This is insane, Barry! - This's the only way I know how to fly. Am I koo-koo-kachoo, or is this plane flying in an insect-like pattern? Get your nose in there. Don't be afraid. Smell it. Full reverse! Just drop it. Be a part of it. Aim for the center! Now drop it in! Drop it in, woman! Oome on, already. Barry, we did it! You taught me how to fly! - Yes. No high-five! - Right. Barry, it worked! Did you see the giant flower? What giant flower? Where? Of course I saw the flower! That was genius! - Thank you. - But we're not done yet. Listen, everyone! This runway is covered with the last pollen from the last flowers available anywhere on Earth. That means this is our last chance. We're the only ones who make honey, pollinate flowers and dress like this. If we're gonna survive as a species, this is our moment! What do you say? Are we going to be bees, orjust Museum of Natural History keychains? We're bees! Keychain! Then follow me! Except Keychain. Hold on, Barry. Here. You've earned this. Yeah! I'm a Pollen Jock! And it's a perfect fit. All I gotta do are the sleeves. Oh, yeah. That's our Barry. Mom! The bees are back! If anybody needs to make a call, now's the time. I got a feeling we'll be working late tonight! Here's your change. Have a great afternoon! Oan I help who's next? Would you like some honey with that? It is bee-approved. Don't forget these. Milk, cream, cheese, it's all me. And I don't see a nickel! Sometimes I just feel like a piece of meat! I had no idea. Barry, I'm sorry. Have you got a moment? Would you excuse me? My mosquito associate will help you. Sorry I'm late. He's a lawyer too? I was already a blood-sucking parasite. All I needed was a briefcase. Have a great afternoon! Barry, I just got this huge tulip order, and I can't get them anywhere. No problem, Vannie. Just leave it to me. You're a lifesaver, Barry. Oan I help who's next? All right, scramble, jocks! It's time to fly. Thank you, Barry! That bee is living my life! Let it go, Kenny. - When will this nightmare end?! - Let it all go. - Beautiful day to fly. - Sure is. Between you and me, I was dying to get out of that office. You have got to start thinking bee, my friend. - Thinking bee! - Me? Hold it. Let's just stop for a second. Hold it. I'm sorry. I'm sorry, everyone. Oan we stop here? I'm not making a major life decision during a production number! All right. Take ten, everybody. Wrap it up, guys. I had virtually no rehearsal for that

"PRIL FOOLS!

, kay, so I'm actually working on the chapter! Lots of stuff has happened in my real life that I would not want to go into. It should be updated in the following week. Also, I'd like to know when you realized that this was just a joke! :D


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